The Orange Jesus and The Apocalyptic Legislative Loonies

Soooo…. The Champion of the entire right wing has spent all the money the National Republican Committee had on hand. I’m too financially challenged to gauge what that means exactly, but if the NRC is paying for Their Champion’s legal bills, they have some collecting to do or Christmas 2024 is not looking cheery. The Champ has 91 felony indictments against him.

I don’t know much about those things, but it seems to me that lawyers for that many felony indictments just might cost two or even three pretty pennies. Now as I understand it, that same Champion is going to run a national campaign for President while he’s spending all the money his campaign can grift on his current judicial woes.

To make things appear to be more dire, he has to come up with something like a half a billion dollars to cover the judgments he’s already been ordered to pay. And he keeps taking things to the Supreme Court and you know that ain’t cheap. Not only that, he just lost the right to run a business in the State of New York. He can’t even borrow from a bank whose identity is registered with the state. That ain’t going to make meeting that kind of steep obligation a Saturday in the park, I think it was the Fourth of July kind of thing even if there is a man selling ice cream and singing Italian songs. Capiche?

You know the dude I’m talking about here, right? Well, that’s the guy who’s setting foreign policy for the United States. Yeppers! And the Republicans snapped to. The Champion of the Republican Party decreed that there should be no aid to Ukraine because The Champion wants Vlad, his authoritarian bro, to win and what will it hurt if The Champion gives him a little pushy-wushy? That’s why he’s The Champion, isn’t it? In short, The Champion is flaming out for his authoritarian bro. Got any more questions about why he does not support gay marriage? Too close for comfort, Champ? You know your addiction to gaudy-glam is a tell, right? Not to mention your propensity for whining and bitching about anything anyone says that disturbs your idea of perfection. Just saying. I know it’s a generality, but if a shoe fits, as they say. I mean, you have to wonder, right Lindsey?

But it’s MagaMike, the Fredo of this tale, who is doubtless about to understand why you have to suffer to sing the blues. The thing is some people seem to work really hard to be liked to the point they’re about as worthless as honking your horn the moment the light changes. Horns just do not move traffic. In fact, my experience is, honking will surely slow traffic down, especially if your honking gets too irritating and armed road rage erupts. But MagaMike really is not responsible for road rage and neither is Old Joe. The Champion, on the other hand, just happens to truck in all manner of rage.

Our Fredo is trying to do what he’s told to do, because he really cannot think for himself, I’m afraid. Besides, if he doesn’t, The Champ is liable to express a little rage in Fredo’s direction. Because Fredo is afflicted with parochial blinders syndrome, he is interpreting his role as the sacrificial lamb the Legislative Loonies are offering up to the god of chaos and destruction. And these Legislative Loonies are not just merely Loonies, but Apocalyptic Legislative Loonies. They wish to bring about the end of times. And the god of chaos and destruction is extremely popular in the tween and teen populations. Anyone can be baptized into the brother/sister/non-binary-hood of the god with any, even piddling, acts of rebellion.

This non-gendered-hood is represented in Congress by the far-right Loonie Legislators. Their spokeswoman is determined to exercise some sort of gender affirming rebellion so she can demonstrate her anger with the world in general. At one time, she managed her oversized frustrations with exercise, but these days, she has to be in committee meetings and all manner of things that require some degree of responsible timeliness. She has already expressed her displeasure with MagaMike keeping the government open the last time he negotiated that deal. Well, Congress is in recess for two weeks and when they get back they will have 72 hours to pass legislation to keep the government open for another couple of days or weeks or maybe even months.

But to even accomplish passing that bill, it will necessarily be bipartisan. The Loonie Legislators’ spokeswoman has vowed she will bring a vote to remove MagaMike as The Champion’s Fredo if he should dare to rely on Democrats to pass legislation ever, ever again. The question is if The Champion, through the spokeswoman, is going to allow his Fredo to stand up for himself or if he’s going to send him for a ride out on the lake.

All of this does sound as though it’s a story about some far-away land in some far-away time, but sadly, it’s about the here and now. The sad part is that men and women with extensive resumes and what appears to be more than a modicum of common sense, are following a guy who is about to go bankrupt yet again as though he’s the pied piper of pied pipers. There could be a connection between the faithful calling The Champion, the Orange Jesus and their blind obedience. I think it has just not occurred to them that The Champion is on course to crash and burn again in November. To quote a current celebrity, come on guys, give me a break.

I once heard that once a program is written it converts into a rule we live by for the rest of our life unless we can see it for what it is, a mere program, and then rewrite it to suit us better. I don’t know if anyone who can be designated as the faithful would understand the concept of a program in this instance, but The Champion has a history of failure that is decades long. You suppose he’s learned in the last three years to curb his enthusiasm? Me either.

You’d think that when the most followed Legislative Loonies super fan got an interview with his idol, Vlad the Murderer, and was roundly chastised for his childish approach to one of the most serious issues on the world stage, there would be, at least, a gradual cooling for the admiration the Legislative Loonies lavish upon his exalted, if murderous, Tzarness. But no. They all in unison said, “Sir, may I have another?”

The only way I can make sense of any of this is if I consider that Jim Jones and The Champion both had or have cult followers who believe what they say. Everything they say. Yo, Republicans, you do remember what happened to the people who believed what Jim Jones told them, right? They’re no longer with us to relate even a part of their story.

There is more than a little probability that the Legislative Loonies, along with The Champion himself, may spend themselves out of existence. Without the money to fund advertising and organizing of the complex operation of presidential politics, it is not likely that even crying that the election will be stolen is going to be a winning argument. I mean guys, you’re anti-abortion, you’re all whining about not being elected when you lose, you bitch about the border, but you won’t fund changes to the border policies. You won’t even protect American interests in NATO and our international treaties. What do you expect? Is there any Republican who has even the least amount of common sense, who thinks that position will win them a national election, ever?

And while I’m at it, red states can not afford to secede from the Union. They can’t manage their income well enough to be close to solvent without massive cash influxes from the Feds. I just can’t see how that set of bankrupt ideas can serve as a presidential plank that will win over the American people. Spending money blue states have paid in federal taxes, while bitching about how blue states do things that attract people to live there and pay taxes, is worse than lame. Americans can think for themselves, you know. And they do every now and then.

This blog was first published on Msrch 18, 2024.

The Wright’s View is a blog written by John Worthington and is presented by The Business of Forging Agreement.

For additional content in a daily email format, I invite you to subscribe to “The Wright’s View” on Substack. I write about the folly of the current political goings-on from outside of what the media presents in the hope of giving anyone who reads my blogs another vantage point to see beyond the minutiae of the everyday.