2016: The Year I Didn't Study with the Zapatistas
But My Application Remains Relevant

Author's Note: I wrote this short essay for an application to study with the Zapatistas in their sovereign territory within Chiapas, Mexico. It's a small excerpt from a more extensive questionnaire, but I believe this section to be particularly resonant and felt inclined to share.
A dear friend died a few weeks before I was meant to depart for the program and grief changed my mind about attending. I felt I could not be present for the heavy content I would be learning and decided to stay home and celebrate her life with our friends.
I still hold these nascent beliefs dear, and have developed them significantly over the years. I cherish these incomplete and "juvenile" thoughts, as they led me down a righteous path of resistance and self-education.
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DO YOU CONSIDER YOURSELF AN ANTI-CAPITALIST? EXPLAIN WHY OR WHY NOT.
I do believe I am an anti-capitalist. I see the benefits experienced by some within our society thanks to our capitalist and neoliberal values. Still, I see the torment it causes for so many others, both globally and domestically. There seems to be more to this economic structure we have chosen than simply a flourishing and free market; in fact, it seems as though the “success” of such a model is not a success for most individuals forced to live within the confines of such a society. It appears to be even less of a success for those subjected to the policies of capitalism without the “protections” of a democratic society. Those of us living in the world intended to profit from these structures are conditioned to ignore the violence that surrounds us and the oppressive influence we permeate.
Placation. The essence of our society in the United States. Moderate access to modern conveniences meant to placate. Media and a consumptive culture designed to quell. I fall victim to it often. My weakness for new and “fine clothes” is perhaps the greatest hole for this analgesic to seep in. But how many there are for me… Music, television, movies, gourmet coffees from one of the too many third-wave shops around. I am more numb than I realized. More pacified. But this pacification comes with anything but peace. There is no peace. There is no calm.
It’s true, we do not live in a constant state of war here in this country. Not in the sense of boots on our ground. We do not have bombs dropped on us every day, and we do not watch our loved ones die over a political end we’ve never even known. We don't hold their body parts in our arms as we curse a leader we've never met. Our home, our country, our government, and our people are the invaders -- the occupiers and the killers—both active and passive powers in this globalizing process.
However, I must remember that all that is wrong with our country is not all that is wrong with the world.
We are not the first conquerors, nor will we be the last, but how have we condoned this tradition?
With our complacency.
“Tacit consent”, as Locke put it. So, what role does this placation fill if, according to our political leaders, we have “nothing to fear” from any threat, government or otherwise? It serves to remove our empathy towards those who must suffer for us to have our surplus.
I've been thinking about consumerism. Its role in our society and why it's so important to us. I came up with something along these lines: insatiate quelling. Our culture of consumption creates insular turmoil and then, through individualism, isolates us in that dis-ease. A dopamine hit with no long term satisfaction. It instills in us a degenerative view of our connection to the rest of the world, and a hunger which only grows when fed.
Such illness in our thinking. Such disease in our ideology.
Surely, our population suffers a terrible ambivalence.
About the Creator
kp
I am a non-binary, trans-masc writer. I work to dismantle internalized structures of oppression, such as the gender binary, class, and race. My writing is personal but anecdotally points to a larger political picture of systemic injustice.


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