The Origins of Narcissism: Exploring the “Why”

Let’s assume that narcissism is a learned behavior…. Sutherland’s theory about learned behaviors doesn’t really answer some serious questions about the free will and choice of each individual. Like two brothers raised by the same mother — one is narcissistic and the other is not. This raises questions about the root causes of narcissistic personality disorder.

Let’s assume that narcissism is environmental. Childhood trauma doesn’t make anyone morally blind. Childhood trauma has nothing to do with our sense of right/wrong, good/evil, reality/falsehood, grateful/ungrateful, thankful/unthankful, gracious/ungracious. Is narcissism genetic? This is a key question in the narcissism debate.

Let’s assume narcissism has a genetic component. Unlike Neurosis, schizoids, ASPD(spectrum), autism, etc…where according to neuroimaging that shows clear patterns, narcissism still has no evidence to support the mental illness statement or any brain-impaired parts. This raises questions about the validity of current narcissism research and the diagnosis of narcissistic personality disorder.

Talking about the belief system that brought us here. It’s Sigmund Freud, who was born on May 6, 1856, (Austria). Being there during the Victorian Era where the preoccupation with sexuality, particularly in women and children, happened. Their sexual interests, and sexual knowledge in addition to automatically assuming fear/anxiety defense mechanisms are behind all disturbance in personality, where the whole Victorian Era was the most depressive time ever. This is a critique of Freud’s theory of narcissism.

Till now such theories are embraced assuming shame, fear, anxiety, and ego-defense mechanisms are behind all narcissistic behaviors. So, in easier words, a narcissist who is having an affair is doing it out of fear…. Weird…really weird. This highlights the limitations of Freud’s theory of narcissism.

Add to it Piaget’s theory for cognitive learned behavior, where he assumed object manipulation for children is the only way to have object constancy, and he divided it into five stages where the mother gets notified on her mobile app (level one accomplished, maybe). This is a critique of the learned behavior approach to narcissism. And I wish I could have some answers from any flying monkey or a narcissist reading this about object constancy and how we have an understanding of abstract things without object manipulation. Or even how paralyzed kids who can’t identify with objects, still can bond and still have the ability to love and connect. Or else we’re dangerously assuming that all paralyzed kids are narcissists. (let me hear some).

Again. All over the world, North America, South America, Europe, Africa, Australia, Asia… Why are all narcissists the same? Taking into consideration the socio/geo/cultural/religious/ethnic differences. This speaks to the core characteristics/behaviors of narcissism.

Back to the point: All narcissistic mechanisms are the same: the un-working soul. Inversion mind. Spiritually worthless. Impaired consciousness. The toxic sense of shame. Disregarding. This is the very definition of an un-working soul and inversion mind & spiritually worthless: You give them good, they can only repay with ill — you give them serenity, and they pay it back with anxiety; awe with frustration, interest with disregarding. This explores the spiritual explanations for narcissism. “They’re utterly useless for personal things. Useless parents, useless spouses, useless friends, useless employees/employers, and they have only malfunctioning parts.”

Impaired consciousness. Do all narcissists have the same tactics? Manipulative tactics work with conscientious people only — try to manipulate one with no conscience, it doesn’t work. Narcissists know how conscience works, so when they play innocent, they are offering rationalization because they don’t wanna be seen as evil; they know they have no conscious. It’s not that they don’t see, or are unaware of it, but they simply disagree. They are aware of it, but they don’t care enough. They are aware, but still, their actions are nefarious, uncaring, and inefficient in human empathy and in human regard. This relates to narcissism and lack of empathy.

The toxic sense of shame. A healthy sense of shame will make you stop and change your behaviors as we all do — a toxic sense of shame will activate their pathology. This discusses narcissism and shame.

Disregarding: self-serving narcissists hold value for you as a human; no commitments, no regard for you as a person. This relates to the narcissistic worldview.