The 7 Secrets to Mastering Self Control

Hello! I'm Rahul Sanaodwala, the founder of StriWears. Welcome to My Stories, a platform where aspiring entrepreneurs get inspired by the journeys of successful founders and learn the secrets to building thriving businesses.

In today’s fast-paced world, self-control is not just a valuable skill—it's a superpower. Whether it’s resisting temptations, forming good habits, or staying focused on your goals, self-control can transform your life in profound ways. In this story, we’ll unveil seven powerful secrets to mastering self-control, equipping you with actionable strategies to take charge of your habits, emotions, and decisions. Ready to unlock your potential? Let’s dive in!

1: Manual Habits

Forming good habits is a grueling process. If you're trying to exercise regularly, there will be times when you want to skip the gym and just eat junk food. You’ll find that you're especially vulnerable to temptation within the first two months.

For a lasting habit to form, it normally takes about 66 days of hard work. This window gives your body and brain time to get accustomed to new behaviors. As long as you're consistent, new habits will start to feel unconscious and automatic by the end.

But before that happens, you have to survive the growing pains of any new habit. You can't cut yourself too much slack or let yourself cheat. We've all had lazy days where terrible judgment calls seemed like a great idea—but they never are.

So, how can you make this process easier? The simple answer is to grit your teeth and try your best to smile through the pain. This arduous process is an essential part of habit formation.

Your body will resist you, and old habits will lead you astray. It won't always feel fun or natural, but you have to keep pushing. The more consistent you are, the faster your habits will form.

2: Daily Monitoring

No matter what you're trying to accomplish, monitoring your behavior is a great way to stay on the right path. Think of it like a to-do list. Doesn't it feel great to look back and see all your goals crossed out?

Monitoring works the same way. Instead of crossing things off, you're filling them in. This gives you the opportunity to physically see your progress.

Calorie counters are a popular example of monitoring. These programs let you keep track of the total calories you consume each day. If you're making progress, those low totals leave you feeling happy and confident. You'll be even more motivated to find the same success day after day.

On the other hand, if you're not making progress, monitoring reminds you of what you're doing wrong. It's easy to ignore a bad habit—out of sight, out of mind, right? But when it's laid out on paper, you can't pretend it didn’t happen.

Daily monitoring ensures that mess-ups don’t just slip through the cracks.

3: Managing Anticipation

Why is it so hard to resist buying the next big thing? How do you stop yourself from doing things you know you shouldn’t?

We struggle to control vices like overspending because of something psychologists call anticipatory joy.

Imagine you see a commercial for the next-generation phone. You love all the new features and suddenly start imagining what your life would be like if you had one. You think of amazing pictures, organized schedules, extravagant vacations, memorable experiences, and lasting friendships.

But here's the catch: it's just a phone.

Anticipatory joy is a trick your brain plays on itself. When you want something, your brain doesn't always think rationally. The idea of improving your life stimulates feel-good hormones, rewarding anticipation and emotion while clouding your judgment.

After you buy the phone, your life doesn’t change. You might even feel disappointed. Unrealistic expectations lead to frustration or regret, pushing you into a cycle of anticipation and disappointment.

To break free, aim anticipatory joy in the right direction. Focus on the person you want to become, not the material things you want. Anticipate the joy of accomplishing your goals, and you’ll find genuine happiness.

4: Patterned Living

To master self-control, you need to view your habits differently. Less disciplined people use an act mindset, seeing individual actions as isolated incidents.

For example, if you're trying to be productive, you might think procrastinating "just once" is harmless. But it’s never just once. Cheating tonight encourages you to cheat tomorrow. By giving yourself a free pass, you let bad habits sneak back in.

Disciplined people, on the other hand, use a pattern mindset. They see each action as part of a larger pattern. Good patterns strengthen self-control, while bad patterns weaken it.

The simple truth? Stronger patterns make stronger people.

5: Calculated Distractions

Self-control isn’t about removing all distractions from your life. Having no distractions can be as bad as having too many.

Distractions relieve stress, recharge your mind, and even inspire creativity. However, there’s a right and wrong way to use them.

Distractions should be short and sweet. They shouldn't take hours or create more stress than they relieve. The goal is to give your mind a quick breather, not take it out of the game entirely.

Great distractions include music, crafts, and snacks. Music lifts your spirits, crafts give your brain creative freedom, and snacks boost your energy. Like any muscle, your brain needs rest and relaxation to perform at its best.

6: Avoiding Temptations

Distractions also help you resist temptations.

A famous study at Columbia University tested self-control by giving marshmallows to four-year-olds. The kids were told not to eat the marshmallows. Those who resisted used distractions like singing or playing games to keep their minds off the treat—and it worked!

You can use the same strategy to avoid bad habits. Instead of binge-watching Netflix, try reading a book, listening to a podcast, or doing chores. Choose distractions that make you feel fulfilled and motivated.

As time goes on, you’ll need distractions less and less. Eventually, those bad habits won’t even cross your mind.

7: Productive Forgiveness

Despite your best efforts, you’ll occasionally slip up. You might skip a day, break your diet, or fall back into old habits.

When this happens, start by forgiving yourself. One mistake doesn’t undo all your progress. Don’t spiral into guilt or throw away your hard work.

Instead, confront your mistake and learn from it. Forgiveness allows you to move forward, but it doesn’t mean letting yourself off the hook. Use your mistakes as motivation to stay on track.

Mastering self-control is a challenging but deeply rewarding journey. From forming new habits to managing distractions and forgiving yourself for slip-ups, these seven secrets provide a roadmap to help you build discipline and resilience. Remember, self-control isn’t about perfection; it’s about progress. Each step you take brings you closer to the best version of yourself.

Thank you for joining us on this exploration of self-mastery. If you enjoyed this story, give it a hearts and share it with your friends so we can keep making more content like this. Here’s to your journey of growth and success!