Smile

68

Every 68 seconds an American is assaulted, according to a Department of Justice poll that was active for over 5 years. This statistic is inclusive of all genders.

The only problem is that it has been proven harder than not, (slight pause) to convince people of these eerily high statistics.

Many women go through extensive trauma, dehumanization, and loss because of this Uninvited Guest.

Pardon my manners,

None of you watching me know who I am. But let’s skip formalities. I am an aggressive, loud, and abrasive friend, meant to scare all predators in this journey I call life. I stride as if I carry the weight of 100 men on my shoulders .

So much so I must’ve forgotten I was a woman. I was knocked off my high horse very fast. Too fast and too early.

Whilst writing this speech. I personally thought I knew exactly what sexual harassment was.

I didn’t. Till I did.

As low as it was, it was at a gas station. Broad daylight, 5 other people in the store.

It was violating to know that someone, regardless of knowing who you were or not, could scare you so badly.

It is the constant “where, what, when, why, how?”

I don’t know why you don't ask them why they put me through a life-changing traumatic experience.

While I could entertain you with my constant back and forth between my lost self and my assaulter, let me tell you a story.

With the pieces of:

Select scenes from Sex Education

My Story from an Unknown Writer

Multiple facts RAINN.org

Alone and Still I Rise by Maya Angelou

Anxiety by Power Poetry

Fireworks by Angela Wybrow

Searching For My Soul, a poem from family and friend poems

Societal Standards, a poem from Power Poetry. Com

Burn by Karen Anglesey

My Looking Glass Self by Diana Marie- Bombardieri

Distrust by Shelby Sterz

Change What Is To Come by an Anonymous Writer

Hate Poem by Julia Sheehan

My Hate For You Will Never Fade by Marie

Smile, the stories of sexual assault

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It's strange how a few short seconds can lead you in a whole new direction,

His cold touch was like a vacuum, sucking out the life in me.

His ears were wide open, but he wouldn't hear my plea.

From a single moment on, my life was forever changed,

It alters how you think and act and see your own reflection.

My looking glass self, the reflection of him stands upright and determined

I hate you truly. Truly I do.

Everything about me hates everything about you.

I may have the sweetest smile, glowing between my nose and chin, but only I know the truth about the deep secrets held within.

I may have the prettiest eyes that have seen more than they should, and have cried more delicate tears than anyone else ever could.

I excavate buried courage and confront the image gazing back at me.

God I hate you

Your decision to touch me left my looking glass self – unclear

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

81% of women have experienced some form of Sexual Harassment. Similarly disconcerting is the fact that most victims don't report their experiences. People don't even mention it to friends, families. And so, sexual harassment is "thriving on the silence of women," granting impunity to perpetrators.

~

Aimee: You can all stop looking at me now.

Viv: So you can’t get on the bus because you think that man’s gonna be on it again?

Aimee: No. It’s more that he had this really kind face. I remember because he smiled at me and didn’t look like some wanking psycho killer.

So it’s like if he could do something like that, then anyone could. I always felt safe before and now I don’t.

At that point, his intention was deliberate; it was very clear and overt. It is a bit funny that a piece of scum is all he'll ever be, and the only thing that he accomplished doing in life is me.

My looking glass self, the reflection of him stands upright and determined

You give me thoughts I normally wouldn’t dare

You’re just an unwanted visitor that springs up out of nowhere

Come anytime and you have no face,

You bring along sadness and isolation,

But I won’t let you protrude my mind again.

Coming at any time anywhere,

School or home; like some kind of chase,

Like i’m the mouse and you’re the cat dying from starvation,

I won’t slip and let you catch me again.

I want to feel light again.

I just want to be at a place where I’m lighter than air,

But you drag me down when I’m near that place,

I can’t escape you no matter my frustration,

Through my head, those thoughts tumbled ‘round..

At night(staccato)in bed, I got little sleep,

As, into my mind, I was digging too deep.

I did not know the right thing to do,

As I kept being given different views.

I gave up(slight pause) and watched you, him, smile in satisfaction.

Why can’t you understand?

Time after time I reassure, time after time you disagree

Not outright, but I see it in your eyes.

You robbed my soul, knowing your presence was sealed with death's kiss

Tossing and turning in the night

Oh, and this is good -

The things you did to me

Took away what made me free.

I was a prisoner to you, locked in a chain.

You played me, like a puzzle piece in a game.

It keeps me awake at night

A cunning facade of empty promises

Even letting you linger in the presence

My mind(staccato) filled with confusion, and his filled with lust.

He took another part of me, the sweetest smile, glowing between my nose and chin, the prettiest eyes, the kindest heart.

I hate you truly. Truly I do.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Every 9 Minutes, child protective services substantiate or find evidence for, a claim of child sexual abuse.

Viv: I used to go to the local swimming pool all the time when I was a kid. One day this guy flashed me his penis in the pool...and it looked all dangly and funny under the water. I told my mum about it, and she wouldn’t let me go back anymore. It’s sad because the pool was my favorite place to go.

My looking glass self, the reflection of him stands upright and determined

(sadly and on the verge of tears talk)

It’s so unfair

(pause)

I have no memory of before, only stains remain since that fateful date

The day you stole my childhood

Nothing was to be the same

Sometimes late at night I simply can't fall asleep

Thinking about how my innocence is no longer mine to keep.

You were the raider of innocence.

The sanctuary of my favorite place

Replaced with tears, elegant pearls that gracefully danced down my face.

I find myself hiding behind this smile,

the one that shows my denial.

I have thoughts of lonesomeness,

which no person should possess.

I camouflage this so well; it feels like I'm in hell.

I want something better,(pause) to not feel all this terror

There are some millionaires With money, they can't use.

Their wives run around like banshees

Their children sing the blues

They've got expensive doctors, to cure their hearts of stone.

But nobody

No, nobody

Can make it out here alone.

I'll never forget,

I'll never forgive.

And all this pain I went through

I had NO choice.

Nobody, but nobody.

And yet I stand strong, to this day.

My hate for you will never fade.

I'll never forget,

I'll never forgive.

The battle is over, now it's the end

I'm the girl still standing...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Aimee: What are you doing here?

Maeve: Getting the bus. We’re all getting the bus.

Driver: Are you getting on or what?

Maeve: Give her a minute. It’s just a stupid bus.

Aimee: It’s just a stupid bus.

My looking glass self, the reflection of him, a piece of scum

Finally, enough denial and nearly destroyed.

Still strong enough to rid myself of you

I see you for what you really are, a drag

Killer of desire, coaxing many

Also blinded by your evil

Oh, and this is good,

Out of the huts of history’s shame

I rise

Up from a past, that’s rooted in pain

I rise

.You may shoot me with your words,

You may cut me with your eyes,

You may kill me with your hatefulness,

But still, like air, I’ll rise.

Does my sexiness upset you? Does it come as a surprise that I dance like I've got diamonds At the meeting of my thighs?

Did you want to see me broken?

Bowed head and lowered eyes?

Shoulders falling down like teardrops,

Weakened by my soulful cries?

You may write me down in history

With your bitter, twisted lies,

You may trod me in the very dirt

But still, like dust, I'll rise.

Just like moons and like suns,

With the certainty of tides,

Just like hopes springing high,

Still, I'll rise.