Metamorphosis of the Mind

And in the blink of an eye, one day my whole life had changed! My earth was shattered like shards of glass falling to the ground beneath my feet.

With each step I took I could feel it cut my soul a little bit deeper than the last. How was I to know the effects I would endure? Having gone on as long as they did, with no end in sight. The unsightly scars that were left behind.

I could not shake these feelings. It was like a thick fog had rolled in and I was lost and could not see through the heavy smog.

It was hard to breathe. I felt like I was being suffocated, trapped inside a body that I no longer had any control over.

My thoughts would steal my joy and take my mind hostage. Replaying the worst experience of my life over and over like a movie on a big screen, stuck on repeat.

The tears streamed down my face like a flowing river, I thought would never stop. The emotions I experienced thrashing around in my mind, like trees and brush being flung through the air by a tornado.

My spirit crushed, as if Thor himself had swung the hammer. I became the quicksand! I quickly sank deep down into the void. Shutting out anything and everything that tried to get near me.

Years went by and I found myself treading in this stagnant water. With the blowing winds formed unimaginable waves, it produced a roaring current that kept trying to pull me under. I tried my best to climb my way up onto the rocky shoreline.

But all I could do was struggle. Every time I would grasp a sharp edge of the rugged rocks above me, my foot would slip on the slimy moss beneath me, as if a rug was pulled out from under me.

As I reached up I felt a vine I could grip onto with all my might, until I gathered enough strength to heave myself out of the muck, and back onto the dry land.

I dried myself up, cleaned myself off, took a deep breath, and thanked the Creator above as the great eagle floated by in the sky.

I took a stroll down a new path home to clear my mind. I felt the warmth from the rays of the sun shining down on my face. I saw this path light up as the sun ever so slightly peaked between the trees.

It was a new feeling, a different feeling than what I have ever felt before. It is like the light that illuminated the skies was a brighter shade than before.

The gloomy darkness was no more, the clouds and rain had gone away. It was a new day, and I had finally walked away from what had almost succeeded in destroying me.

The smoldering spark from my inner soul had enraged in a fiery inferno. The joy and happiness inside brought this never ending smile to my face. My eyes lit up with a tiny sparkle that glistened as I once again became alive.

I was determined to defeat my demons, and all their lies. Those who threw me under the bus leaving me to die. I found the courage within me to plant a new seed. To water and nourish and watch it fully bloom.

It is as though the water I used was from the fountain of youth. Hand delivered to me by the water protector living near the Great Lakes. Blessed by a medicine man in a special ceremony.

I once again remembered who I was and where I had come from. A long line of Ancestors who had fought, and survived, and lived on through their resilience. I am a Warrior!

The blood coursing through my veins gave me a new purpose. The language of my people spoke to me. Yukwatsistay^... Our Fire, Our Spirit, Within Each of Us!

As I looked into the mirror one more time I now saw a more vibrant reflection staring back at me. One of Strength, One with Vision, One who will lead the next seven generations.

My voice is quiet no more, I stand up and share my story within my community.

Our cultures, our values, and our traditions is who the Creator created me to carry on, and spread across Turtle Island. I soon saw myself shapeshift into a wise elder.

My life was starting over, it was rebuilding what I had lost, my identity. I searched high and low through valleys and on mountain tops. I flew miles and trekked new lands. I became one with a higher calling.

My mind filled with peace as the cool breeze and smells of sweetgrass from a meadow rushed in. All though I physically was still in the city, my unwelcoming concrete jungle.

I was transported to a new destination where thoughts no longer filled with a darkness that kept out the light and only allowed in the shadows.

Images in my head began to emerge, my thoughts no longer becoming unraveled. The doubts are no longer stealing my thunder. I am like the phoenix rising from the ashes.

I can now share these stories, another oral history being passed down through generations. The Woman Warrior of the Onʌyoteˀa·ka (People of the Standing Stone).

I now stand on solid ground. Mother Earth welcomes me back. Grandmother Moon shines her light upon me and sweet dreams invite me to enter.

Dreams of a better future filled with great gifts from the Creator. I can once again pass these blessings down as they begin to grow like a perfectly watered garden.

I tend to no longer appease those who only seek what they need. I am now becoming re-balanced like a magnet attracting positivity and a new force to be reckoned with.

I became the siren in the seas, I became the forceful winds of the hurricane, I became the beautiful butterfly that flew away.