How To Improve Your Life Through Relationships

On the day of the orientation for my Honours year, the course coordinator had something to say about choosing a supervisor:

What you are going to research is important, but choose according to who you think you are going to have the best relationship with!

And true enough, a couple of weeks later, studying assessments and intervention in psychology, I discovered that this is also important for therapy. In short, your connection/relationship with your counsellor is correlated to optimal therapy results more than the type of intervention, or what you do and talk about during your session.

So I wondered. Is it the same for other fields of life?

If You Have a Boss

Having good relationships at work has a lot of benefits.

It is well understood and recognised that if you operate in a team environment, you should develop and maintain positive connections with your coworkers. This reduces stress (you're probably already stressed from the amount of work you're doing, or you're bored) and helps you stay productive by giving you more information. To put it another way, the more relationships you have at work, the more people you relate to, the more likely you are "relating" to someone who is aware of what is going on. This might be because some people have stronger ties with their superiors or employers.

Moreover, having a good relationship with your boss (or your employees) has its own benefits.

Better relationships with your bosses are connected to a higher perception of workplace quality and higher work-related performance. As an extra bonus, this form of engagement has been linked to a reduction in stress.

From the perspective of the boss (or management, or supervisor, etc. ), excellent communication initiated by the boss (or manager, or supervisor, etc.) is critical to the improvement of employee mental health.

That's also because effective communication and a positive connection between the supervisor and the employees are necessary for increased productivity.

A boss/manager/supervisor who is unable to communicate effectively is likely to lose a large number of employees.

If You are Studying

 It is crucial to have good and helpful supervisors. Yes, they are still your bosses, not your closest friends, and feedback may be harsh at times, especially if it is negative. However, choose someone with whom you have a strong relationship and who appears to be supportive during your thesis writing (or whatever else you need to do). Cooperation is the crucial word here.

PhD students and their supervisors have perhaps the longest academic supervised relationship. What isn't often discussed is the fact that over half of PhD candidates, or 50%, quit their studies.

What does this have to do with the subject of this post? When questioned (by Nature), students appear to have stated that the impact of a poor supervisor relationship is their top concern.

After all, why not? This is a person (or individuals) with whom you will be spending years of your life collaborating.

Approximately half of the students interviewed by Nature said they had conflicts with their supervisors. Furthermore, they claimed that their superiors "bullied" them.

Good connections, on the other hand, will encourage cooperation, contentment, and possibly productivity.

A healthy connection is the foundation for strong performance and a means of encouraging collaboration and the success of all members of a research group.

What Can We Do with this Knowledge?

So, whichever sphere of life you're in right now, remember to cultivate positive relationships. Be a good listener and seek out those who are. Collaboration and teamwork are essential components of success. Consider walking away if the other person (employer, supervisor, therapist) does not seem to want to do the same. If you're unable to move away, get assistance from someone who can!

Statistics don't lie (usually), and it appears that good human interactions are at the centre of everything that matters. So, when you get the opportunity, develop excellent ones!

Sources and further readings

Therapeutic alliance and outcome of psychotherapy: historical excursus, measurements, and prospects for research

The Impacts of the High-Quality Workplace Relationships on Job Performance: A Perspective on Staff Nurses in Vietnam (nih.gov)

Good boss, bad boss, workers’ mental health and productivity: Evidence from Japan

A message for mentors from dissatisfied graduate students (nature.com)