Hillinskis Hope

Hillinski’s hope is a foundation started by Kym and Mark Hillinski, after their son Tyler tragically took his own life January 16, 2018. At the time Tyler was the starting quarterback for the Washington State Cougars. He was a happy go lucky guy, but unfortunately nobody knew of the problems going on in his head. I find what the Hillinskis are doing for the athletic community to be super vital. As someone that suffered for the better part 6 years due to concussions with no real answers. We need to change the narrative surrounding concussions and make people aware that they are damaging to your brain. You need to be careful with your brain because once that goes I don’t care how physically fit you are or anything else, you’re in serious trouble. It’s nothing to take lightly and with the Hillinski family being advocates for athlete mental health, hopefully we can curb the amount of former football players, and athletes in general, that take their own lives. Their selflessness is inspiring. To take a serious tragedy and use it to help others is absolutely incredible.

I can remember when the issues first started for me I was 20 and didn’t know what to do. I’d been to a neurologist and other doctors trying to understand it all. You feel lost, scared, frustrated and you don’t understand what’s going on in your head and why your thoughts are so dark. Why Hillinski’s hope is so vitally important in my life is because I know exactly where Tyler was mentally. At the age of 23 I held a gun to my head and was going to call it a day, but I could hear my grandmother's voice in my head telling me not to, I still had a purpose to fulfill. I remember putting the gun down and balling my eyes out. It’s not easy fighting a disease that doesn’t show up on a traditional MRI scan and that is still super taboo among football players. You feel weak and you don’t want to bother your friends with it. There's also nothing more demoralizing than having a certified doctor tell you that it’s all in your head., The work that the Hillinski family is doing is incredibly important to so many of us.

These days I use my experience and knowledge to help others in need that are where I was. I don’t ever want to see another person suffer in silence like I had to. It’s absolutely miserable and the loneliest feeling you’ll ever have. Hillinski’s hope gives me hope, motivation and drive to continue what I’m doing, especially on the days when I’d rather not talk about my problems anymore.. Their selflessness in many ways has saved my life because as long as they continue fighting the good fight, I feel like my own issues will eventually be solved with enough research and focus on it. It’s so vitally important for the athletes. We can no longer turn a blind eye to the problems concussions cause. Mike Webster, Justin Strzelczyk, Dave Duerson, Tyler Hillinski all deserve to have their stories told and we owe it to their memory to ensure that suicides from brain injuries becomes zero! It’s important that we put checks and balances in place more stringent to ensure the safety of all athletes. I still very much love football, but the days of headhunting and playing through a concussion, like I did many times has to end. It’s not worth the trauma you’re doing to your brain. We were taught to use our heads growing up and therefore I’ve easily taken over a thousand shots to my head whether that be sub concussive or a full blown concussion, being an offensive and defensive lineman the whole game you’re going helmet to helmet, and the helmets we used are now illegal. I was taught that you were weak if you sat out with a headache. Or if you even talked about your problems. Now I understand how stupid that premise is to begin with. No victory on this planet is worth risking the lives of your athletes. You owe it to your players to protect them. Set your ego aside and understand the ramifications of it all. It’s not worth trading a life for any win!