Having opinions and preferences.

To have an opinion or a preference is human nature. We may act indifferent in front of others but if we were to be given a choice, we’d certainly prefer one thing over the other. There’s nothing wrong with either of these situations. The problem arises when we try to shame others for having a different opinion as compared to us or for not matching our standards set by our preferences. So how can we be a unique human being who’s also inoffensive at the same time?

The issue at hand:

Let’s consider a situation. I prefer my diet with meat in it. I can simply eat my choice of meal whenever I want. If a vegan person tries to persuade me towards a meatless diet, I can either respectfully refuse or I can throw an absolutely massive tantrum, calling them out for their hypocrisy and telling them how they’re the ones neglecting their nutritional needs, acting as a pawn for these soulless corporations! Hmmm. Which one do you think is more likely to lead to a sensible argument?

Even though most of you would probably say that I should go with the first approach, sadly that’s not what’s happening in the world. Its almost as if people have completely lost patience. Tolerance is unheard of nowadays. People are just waiting for any likelihood of contradiction so that they may pounce on others and cause chaos. Even in the situation I presented above, it is highly likely that the vegan person just starts off aggressive which completely gets rid of any hope of having a sensible argument from the very beginning.

The scope and the reason:

This issue exists not only for the meat argument but for all and any argument involving opposing preferences. You may like having your coffee a certain way and it’s very likely that you’ll get more roasted then the coffee beans for having that preference. You can prefer a tall person and get cancelled by the short people. You can prefer a fit body and get cancelled by the plus-sized community.

Do you favor a political party? Do you prefer biscuits to chips? Do you like cats over dogs? It doesn’t matter how well put together your arguments are, there’ll always be people trying to belittle your standpoint solely because it opposes their viewpoint. The other side of the picture is worse. You may actually realize that you’re on the wrong end of the argument. You may actually believe that these people are telling the truth. But by then you are so far gone that you’ll keep defending your earlier views out of sheer pettiness. It’s a lose-lose situation either way.

The remedy: “Acceptance”

Now you may think that the solution to this would be to build tolerance and practice patience as often as possible and you would be correct. That should be the final goal. But I would argue that the first step towards betterment should be acceptance.

1. Accept you feelings of aggression and irritation as natural and then try to keep them encased.
2. Accept others people views and opinions as respectable and acknowledge their importance

Let me elaborate:

I said in the beginning that having opinions and preferences is human nature. Likewise, feeling offensive towards someone being aggressive or belittling your views is also natural. But remember this:

“You aren’t responsible for others actions but only for your own and -your dependent’s."

When arguing your opinion, it is likely that you’ll feel anger and irritation. If any of your claims get debunked, you might want to resort to clash. This is the point where you need to practice patience. The more you practice, the more tolerance you’ll develop. But it isn’t possible if you don’t accept this behavior as natural. Knowing that aversion to opposing viewpoints is a part of human nature, it’ll become a lot easier for you to accept it, put it aside and stay calm and level-headed.

Similarly, if you don’t consider their views to be important or don’t give them due respect, then there won’t be an argument in the first place. Your opposition will simply consider you a hater and refute all your arguments even before they’re presented. If you’ve a tough time accepting their views, just imagine how hurt you’ll get if they disrespect you views. Why should you treat them differently? Always remember:

“Treat others the way you want to be treated.”

End word:

Maybe one day people will actually realize how easy it is to convert someone to your belief or change someone’s opinion simply by being respectful, cooperative and nice towards them. You can pressure people into joining your side but at heart, they’ll never accept you. The way the current world is, it doesn’t seem that this is about to change anytime soon. But here’s to hoping for a better future anyways. Thanks for reading!