The Reinvention of Kitty Sunderson

I do hope Topher Payne, who created Kitty for the play Perfect Arrangement, doesn't mind this additional chapter. Having played Kitty night after night, a thought came to me, and as I wondered on it, this whole scene came and I just had to get it on paper. Please note that this play was set in the fifties at a turbulent time for those in the LGBT+ communities and therefore so is this piece.

The chime of the doorbell sounded quite insistent, and Kitty nearly stood before deciding no-one would be calling for her, and Beulah took care of everything to do with the house. Still just in case Beulah needed to tell her something Kitty put down the paper and picked up her ladies’ magazine. It simply wouldn’t do for any outsiders to see her acting inappropriately.

Kitty tried to focus on the article about the new style coming out of the fashion houses but, as happened more and more these days, her mind was elsewhere. She had told dear Millie that she would bring much needed vim and vigour into the Matron’s League, yet the truth was she had also brought something into Kitty’s life, cracked open a little the tight control of the walls she had built into her life, she just wasn’t sure how to describe it.

There was a knock on the doorframe and Beulah cleared her throat politely. Plastering on a smile Kitty turned to the housekeeper.

“Excuse me Mrs, there is a Mildred Martindale in the front room to see you.”

Kitty blinked at Beulah, not quite certain she’d heard correctly. Millie had never been to Kitty’s house by herself before and certainly not uninvited. She was used to being tolerated and only sought out if someone wanted something. Millie had never done that. “I’m sorry, what?” Maybe she really was starting to lose her mind like Millie’s aunt Regina, despite the memory games she had taken to doing.

“Mrs Martindale is here to see you, though I can say you are unavailable if you like?”

“No, that’s fine,” said Kitty. “Please offer her a drink I’ll be there in a moment.” Standing Kitty brushed her hands down her blue skirt to straighten it and slipped her feet into a pair of heels. She quickly looked into the mirror to check her hair and make-up were all good. With all that was supposed to be Kitty firmly in place, she went to greet her young friend.

“Millie dear, what a delightful surprise. Or did we have something planned and I’ve forgotten. Oh dear.”

The young woman stood and smiled, though there was something off about it. It was a little sad Kitty thought.

Millie reached her hands out but dropped them before they could clasp Kitty’s. “Oh no Kitty no plans. I hope you don’t mind me dropping around uninvited.”

“Not at all dear. Beulah is bringing coffee, or tea if you prefer. Please sit back down.”

“I probably shouldn’t stay. This was a terrible mistake, I’m sorry.”

Kitty covered the ground between them and took one of Millie’s hands. “Don’t be sorry sweetheart, please do sit, enjoy a drink and tell me what has you looking a little down.”

“You noticed?” Millie allowed herself to be led to a chair.

Kitty took the seat opposite. “I told you dear, I’m very good at noticing things.”

“Yes but…”

Kitty smiled. “But I’m forgetful, silly and not all that smart.”

Millie struggled to meet Kitty’s gaze. How did she never really notice how piercing it could be.

Kitty continued. “I know dear that I was likely little more than a means to an end for you. I wasn’t lying when I told you I’d never had girlfriends before. I simply never got the hang of it.” Kitty looked up as Beulah entered. “Tea for me, and you Millie?”

“Tea for me as well, thank you.”

Beula poured from a beautiful teapot and Millie looking around, notices for the first time just how well-appointed Kitty’s house appeared, how perfectly curated, with every proper thing in its place, but nothing particularly personal that spoke of Kitty’s personality that she had seen glimmers of. How had she not comprehended this before? Everything was just so. Even her hostess.

Kitty sat and waited patiently until Beulah finished and left the two alone again. Picking up her cup, bone china with a delicate floral design, and looked directly at Millie. “Now tell me, to what do I owe this surprise visit. If you don’t mind me saying, you look a little out of sorts. Is everything alright?”

Millie reaches for her cup, then pulls back, realising if she holds onto what she came to say, she may never say it, and it was so very important to say, especially now. Change wouldn’t happen if she and others like her couldn’t find their honest voices, and well she was leaving town anyway, if Kitty blabbed, they would already long gone.

Kitty watched over her teacup as Millie drew in a breath.

“I have a confession to make.”

“Oh my,” Kitty’s smile was soft. “I’ve never had anyone confide in me like this before. It sounds serious.”

“It is.” Millie looked up and met Kitty’s gaze. “Do you remember when I told you my mother and I didn’t talk?”

“Of course sweetheart.”

Millie swallowed around the lump forming in her throat. “That is very true. She caught me kissing a girl.”

Kitty blinked. She wasn’t quite sure what she was hearing.

Millie looked away, not wanting to lose her courage. “I like girls Kitty. It wasn’t Jimmy being slightly younger that was bothering you. It was that Norma is like me. We love each other and were living a lie. A make believe so we would be left alone. I just can’t live that lie anymore. Not with Bob destroying the lives of people like me. There is nothing wrong with us. We have hopes and dreams and feelings like everyone else and I think we should be allowed to love who we want without persecution. I can’t keep pretending anymore and you’ve been so nice to me, somehow you’ve come to mean something to me so I wanted to tell you personally, before I leave town, even if it means you’ll hate me and report us to Teddy.”

The rush of words faded, and Millie picked up her cup in unsteady hands. The warmth of the cup was somehow soothing. The quiet between them felt heavy and Millie didn’t have the confidence to try and meet the older woman’s gaze. Fear and shame sat heavy in her chest.

“Girls.” Kitty’s word breaks the silence. She takes a sip of tea and puts her cup down. “But dear, you can’t, it’s wrong.”

“Is it though Kitty?”

Kitty’s brow furrows. “But you yourself said those type of people suffered from mental illness.”

“We had to say things like that, we couldn't let you know, let your husband know, what we really think.”

Kitty nods, blinks like Millie had seen her do a hundred times and she finally realised it was Kitty’s way of giving herself space to process.

Eventually Kitty breaks the silence, her voice dropping a tone. “So, what are we going to do about this dear?”

Millie stares at her for a moment. “What?”

“What do you want me to do silly?”

“Do?”

“Yes dear. The only reason I can see for you to come and speak to me like this is because we really are friends.”

“Kitty, I haven’t been very nice to you. I lied. I suggested there was something wrong with your memory. I didn’t enjoy going out with you all the time either.”

“I know you lied about some things. I really only thought you were tolerating me because Teddy is Bob’s boss. I wanted us to be friends but…well I’ve already told you I was no good at it. I wanted to hope though.”

Kitty sniffed and Millie could see the sheen of tears in the other woman’s eyes.

“You know what though,” Kitty continued, “When we were doing the invitations I thought maybe… and here you are, telling me your biggest secret. That must make us friends. Honestly you don’t seem like you’re mentally ill to me, and you’re not a monster, or at least you don’t seem like one, and I’m a very good judge of character.” She swiped at a tear that tracked down her cheek.

“There will be plenty who say otherwise,” said Millie, as she felt something ease in her own chest.

“Well, phooey on them. The thing is Millie I don’t understand. Not really. Maybe I never will but I am willing to listen because my only real friend trusted me with this truth and that means an awful lot.”

Millie sat stunned. It was true. She had viewed Kitty as a means to an end and a ditzy annoyance, but with all the time they had been spending together there had been something else as well. Kitty’s openness had somehow made her feel safe and until this moment she hadn’t realised how rare that was. Kitty’s reaction in this made her feel safe yet again.

“You’re not going to kick me out?”

“Why dear? Because I don’t understand a thing? There are so many things I don’t understand, including most of what Teddy says. He goes on about things and I repeat them like a dutiful wife. Polite society has its rules, but I’ve already told you I have broken some of them. Teddy doesn’t pay that much attention to me. It is true, he was heaven sent, he took me away from the life I could have been stuck with and I gave him a pretty looking wife who did all the right things. I imagine one day soon he will come home with some sort of story about you and I’ll have to go ‘oh dear that’s sad’, while I knock back a glass of wine and he will keep talking without noticing. I made him do memory exercises with me you know. It was easy to get him to do, I think he is worried that if I lose my mind what will that mean for him. But this isn’t about me.”

“You’re not losing your mind Kitty. I needed you to think you were because you were so close to guessing our secret.”

“I’m not very smart.”

“You were smart enough to see glimpses of something others couldn’t.”

“Well I guess that is quite true. Unless you are lying to me right now.”

Millie shook her head, and a small smile pulled at her mouth. “I’m not. We’re going to leave town. Thank you for not hating me.”

“Nonsense dear. Do you want me to say anything if Teddy does?”

“We will be telling everyone that I have gone to look after my sick mother, no-one will question it because the only person I’ve told the truth to is you. You can say whatever you want. I trust you to make the right decision.”

There is a sharp intake of breath from Kitty. “Are you going to be all right?”

“I’m scared – truthfully, but I know it is the right thing to do.” Millie stands.

Kitty stands as well and holds out her hands. “Well, I guess this is the final Ta. Take care Millie dear. Tell Normie the Geritol thing is still good advice.”

As she walks Millie to the door, she picks up her purse and hands Millie ten dollars. “It’s not a lot and I have a feeling you could really do with it.”

Millie doesn’t reach to take it.

Kitty puts it directly into her hand and closes her fingers around it. “Hush. Teddy won’t even notice but if he does, I’ll just tell him I went out to lunch and bought a new hat or two, he doesn’t keep track of those things. Thank you for finally being honest with me and being my friend.”

With a final squeeze of her hand Kitty lets Millie go.

Kitty stands with her back to the door after it closes and thinks. Girls liking girls is a bit weird and she doesn’t really understand it but she couldn’t see anyone going to war over it.

Later when Teddy gets home, she puts the newspaper back in his den before freshening up her lipstick and greeting him with a smile. “Good day at work dear?”

He distractedly takes the Tom Collins from his wife’s hand. “Damnedest thing. I was going to have to fire Norma Baxter, but it seems she’s left of her own accord. Quit young Martindale said. Oh, and we will have to postpone our dinner with the Martindale’s because his wife has had to go home to Ohio to look after her sick mother or something. She was a good little housewife let’s hope this doesn’t affect his work.”

Kitty picks up a drink of her own. “Oh dear. Sometimes things just don’t work out I suppose.” A small smile is hidden by her glass as Teddy walks right passed her into his den.

FIN