Sight

Sight

A stale, foul odor rose from the little lagoon in the middle of my paradise. The wind picks up and wafts away the awful stench of algae and decay, only to be replaced by the sweet smell of German Chamomile, Plumeria, and Oak. The mixture inflamed my senses. I drank in this welcome aroma in tall glasses as I reached back to my faraway home. I drifted in the limbo of time to when I was a little girl sitting on sandy beaches.

I could see the mists of early morning rising around the rivers of the home I belonged. I could hear waves crash upon the exposed coral at low tide. I also saw rain splatter the smooth surface and create the ripples of the past, present, and future thoughts.

The vision of emerald moss upon waterfall rocks takes hold of my imagination. This place, in my mind, is my home, beach, river, and mystical realm. Sensations kept me spellbound in the distance.

I have not felt at home since.

My family's travel, and relocations, were a joke.

Then I found my life.

The life-giving breeze lifted me as it blew through my hair and gave me wings to fly. I soared on the backs of wind-dragons, and we cut through the silver lining in the clouds as we dove out of heaven and shot to the unknown, to adventure.

Oh no!

I am falling. I was leaving my wind friends. They dove after me trying to keep me in their realm of freedom, but I plummeted too fast to catch.

I was jolted away by the jibber jabber of voices.

I tumble.

No, please.

I can't make them out, but they are louder and louder and uninvited.

I can't breathe.

I start to feel a slight pressure on my shoulder, then a gentle shaking.

Death, he has me. He was shaking me to see if I was worthy of his touch.

NO! Please, I want. I need my friends back.

I dropped into an endless plummet.

"Hey…Hey, kiddo." The voice is bringing me back to my world. This world of horror and unfairness is ridiculous. I breathed in the scent of the gardens, and my senses became flooded with memories, painful and beautiful.

No, I don't want it. Please, a little longer, I can't go back.

"Sam, my flower, where did you go this time? You slipped away."

I found myself pulling together what Robin asked. I gathered my focus to see her blue, almost thundercloud grey-blue hair gleaming in the sunlight. I could see what looked like waves dancing on the surface of the pebbled walkway as I looked away. The walkway shimmered like a mirage. It happened again. I think I drifted away to see without seeing. I smelled my youth, Laura, and felt my future, nothing.

"Hello, earth to Sam. Anybody home?" Robin playfully asked.

I finally sharpened my focus again on her sweet grey eyes, so loving and caring. I looked away at the swishing of Chi Chi leaves. Brilliant green and sharp-edged as they are, a small lizard flashed out of the brush unscathed.

Funny that I was falling from my dragons and then saw an old friend here.

"Ok, girl. You are starting to scare the shit out of me now. What gives? What the hell is going on? What did you see?" asserted Robin.

"Hmmm…" was all I sounded to let her know was I still semi-there. No, yes or no, just hmmm. I want to go back and see it again. I don't want to be here anymore. I want that place, the wind, the dragons, and my past. I wish for it back. I crave her back.

"It's hot out here," I said lazily.

It didn't help that I wore jeans and a dark t-shirt in this hot August weather. It didn't help that my dark blond-red hair came down to the middle of my lower back, and I had to wear it loose and flowing. It has been years since I wore ribbons. It's been years since she left. There goes that lizard again, and this time it paused to soak up the sun's warmth.

I wish it were that easy. To find nourishment by basking in the sunlight must be divine. If only it were that simple. Then the clouds obscured the sun and caused the little dragon to hurry back to the brush and leave me here again.

I fear for Robin. I don't want to leave her behind. I don't want her to feel this feeling of isolation, of being left behind. Maybe that's what it feels like to be left behind, empty, disappointed, and hurt.

She has been so good to me. The best friend a girl could have. She has stood by me through fights with friends as I shut them out one by one. She was rock as I fought with myself, and now this. But she doesn't know everything about my new dilemma. I love Robin more than anyone in this world, I love her the way I wish I could have before, but I let her go because I loved her. I was there when she married Cerri last September. I wrote their vows. I was Robin's Maid of Honor. We have been there for everything with each other, but how to tell her this. How to say to her I am leaving her.

"Robin," I said, getting her attention.

"Yes, my sweetheart. You finally speak."

I saw her beautiful, wonderfully sculpted face. The gods were kind to her in this cruel unyielding world, but her brow creased as she noticed the severe look on my face.

Do it. She needs to know.

"Robin."

"Wait. Do you need your pills? Some water, perhaps?"

She started to rummage through my bag in search of water and meds.

"Robin, stop. Please listen." I took a deep breath and grabbed my bag from her hands.

"I am dying."

She said nothing but looked at me and then away.

"What did you see?"

She knew of my little gift of being able to see into life and read the past, present, and future. It started after a car crash seven years ago, and my love, my life, died.

She knew this and still loved me for it.

What a pair we make, the School Principal and the psychic.

"Nothing. My past and present."

"No future?"

"No. No future."

She put my pills back in my bag and sat back, stunned, looking at the tree where I found the meaning to my life. Robin put this bench here to celebrate her, and I loved her for it.

She took her arm, draped it around my shoulders, pulled me to her slender shoulder, stroked my hair, and kissed my forehead. We listened to the wind, smelled the Chamomile, and sat peacefully, letting our actions say all that was on our minds.

She is here now. We are here, basking in the sunlight, but I don't want to leave her behind.

"You will finally see her soon," Robin whispered.

I nodded and let a lone tear fall from my eye. She lifted my chin and she felt the drop splash onto our intertwined hands. She looked deeply into my eyes. She looked past all of the walls that I constructed and saw me as the scared little girl inside those walls from our youth. She took my hand, twisted my engagement and wedding ring, and I thought about the day to be the happiest of my life, only to become the bane of my existence.

"I am sorry, Robby," I said as I leaned in to kiss her cheek. She smiled slightly at the same memories I had.

"I have not been called that in years," she smirked. I only looked at her with warmth. I found a tear roll down her cheek, wiped it away, and then leaned back on her shoulder. I took a deep breath and let it out.

"Thank you for loving me," I said. Then the air left my lungs, my eyes closed, and Robin let her tears run freely. She opened her phone, dialed a number, and held me gently.

"Cerri, my love, she is gone," then she hung up the phone and held me, kissed my lips, and said goodbye.

I looked away from the scene that broke my heart when I saw her, my love, my life standing there leaning against our tree, looking gorgeous as she had on our wedding day. I went to her and finally felt peace.

If you like what you read please feel free to contribute to a day one would never have to live without the love of their life.