Your Doll

You said I had everything,

A home and a meal,

You said I was loved,

spoiled and rotten.

You forgot the blood,

smeared on the wall,

All the nights spent in tears,

My back to the wall.

Curled in a ball,

Facing the door,

Arms across my chest,

Defensive veneer.

That time in the bathroom,

Wasn't that suspicious?

But no one spoke up,

So I carried it alone.

And to this day,

I carry every word,

Every touch uninvited.

I hear your voice,

When I berate myself,

Using the same words,

The same voice of hate.

Maybe I could have been something,

But you broke me down,

Beating everything out of me,

To make your own shell.

You could have been proud of me,

But you left me empty.

Without a clear vision,

And all my ideas,

Money in mind,

But no memory of family.

Be seen and not heard,

Eat everything on your plate.

Dress up and smile,

Do not speak unless spoken to,

And be always polite.

Above all, be a doll,

A face in a line,

Just another of many,

Not your own life this time.

Keep silent your pain,

Your suffering and tears,

Hide your blood and it’s stains,

For all of your years.