Unrembered memories

As i think and reflect on how i come to be. I look in the the mirror so i can see what you see. Now i know i love myself unconditionally but there is something i must confesss buried deep inside of me. Buried so deep it was hard to discover. Amongst hidden pain there lies a little boy filled with worry and wander.

Wandering is it normal that my first memory is a feeling of fear worrying that my home is in turmoil whenever my dad is near. Wandering why nobody seen the pain in my eyes or that the day care lady was full of lies. Now as a parent i know you cant prevent your child from everything that goes on . But i wish i told my mom my fear when that day care lady cut that stove on . When she cut that that stove on we were told to sit, now this is what they called punishment for our behavioral fits. Now Ive held this in too long so lets talk about it.

So many times i wa scared to sleep in the night, worried to death about being woken to a violent fight. Not understanding why i cant sleep without the lights.

A few memories i bury so deep, without being properly handled its hard to stand on my own two feet. These are not my sins that i was given , but the outcome is that this is my life, and i have the choice to make the best of my living .

There not enough drugs and drinks to numb my thoughts, So i became the man to learn what was best. Not repeating the same mistakes of some men who only knew less.

Amongst hidden pain there lies a little boy filled with worry and wonder. Now here stands a grown man who reuse to be pushed under.