Troll to Doll

Did you hear about that troll from the mountains?

You’ll know when you see her diving in waterfalls.

Blonde pigtails wrapped in a green ribbon

And toenails shaped as swords

Never seen without wearing a vikings skull.

Legend says it was her first husband.

Well my point is, she came all the way from Iceland

To come to the Jeremy Kyle to prove that one of the big football players from Liverpool is the father to her six year old son.

If it’s true, I’d like to know where and how.

If it’s not true, it wouldn’t surprise me.

But know we will never know, because she never showed up.

The audience were looking forward to meeting her and hoped to get a look at her teeth.

Her relatives launched a campaign to find her, but had no success.

Perhaps she was lost.

Perhaps the sun took her.

There was a lead, when the people of Blackpool wondered why there was a statue of Victoria Pollard in the middle of the road.

They were sure it was her, but the authorities wouldn’t talk.

One son reckoned she was murdered cause her skull was gone. It was her no doubt, there was no denying it.

There are no trolls in Blackpool they were led to believe.