The Rats Keep Score
Villanelle.
Behold the man deserving of sackcloth
Whose modesty, façade is stripped bare
Picked apart by the rats and the moth
~
He who hides in shadows from wroth
Avoiding the onlookers as they stare
Behold the man deserving of sackcloth
~
Who runs from battle in fear and loth
Falling dick first into a tempting snare
Picked apart by the rats and the moth
~
As he sits and rots against his Taharoth
Placing blame elsewhere - Life's not fair
Behold the man deserving of sackcloth
~
With skin flayed by the scythe-like swath
Is his tortured mind beyond repair
Picked apart by the rats and the moth
~
But redemption is possible through troth
As his fragility is exposed, flesh bare
Behold the man deserving of sackcloth
Picked apart by the rats and the moth
*
Thanks for reading!
Author's Notes: The only notes I am going to give is some help with understanding the meaning of words you may be less familiar with.
- wroth — anger, alternative spelling to wrath
- loth — reluctant, unwilling, alternative spelling to loathe
- taharoth — state of ritual purity
- swath — a broad strip or mown row of crops/grass, alternative spelling to swathe
- troth — a solemn vow of fidelity, in a marital context
About the Creator
Paul Stewart
Award-Winning Writer, Poet, Scottish-Italian, Subversive.
The Accidental Poet - Poetry Collection out now!
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FPS: The Last Flame Challenge Winners
Welcome to our first Winners Announcement of the year and to the final challenge in the Fall Poetry Series. The Last Flame invited writers to sit with endings, using fire as a central image to consider what remains when something burns out: ash, warmth, memory, silence, or the faint promise of what comes next. The strongest pieces treated endings as gradual rather than sudden, allowing them to flicker, dim, and linger.
By Vocal Curation Teamabout 16 hours ago in Resources
Comments (16)
Congratulations! You sure like to challenge us, both in writing & reading. I learnt a new word “ taharoth”😵💫🤗
Well, I'm pleased to see this on the list, even though my favorite of your entries wasn't chosen. :D This was my second favorite. I really love the rhymes you chose, how solid the refrains feel, like lead feet coming down. Such a self-flagellating piece, yet with a spark of hope thrown in at the end. Congratulations, Paul!
Another fantastic placement. Congratulations
Wooohooooo congratulations on your win! 🎉💖🎊🎉💖🎊
Love the imagery, great job!
I had no idea what "taharoth" meant, so thanks for teaching me something new. "Picked apart by the rats and the moth" adds quite the visual, and I like the possibility of redemption in the final stanza. Congratulations, Paul, on your win, and I second what you already said; it's nice to see your name next to mine ❣ 👏
Congratulations, my ornery Scottish friend. Alas, this lass was snubbed as not properly regretful or obsessed. No worries, someone said I’m the only one here posting sestinas, so I’m hopeful for Last Flame.
Well I can say for sure I learned some fancy new words today - so thank you Paul!! Excellently written as always!
Nice work as usual, Paul.
I suspect that this may be the first villanelle in history to contain the phrase "dick first." Truly, you are a pioneering poet, my liege!
Oh thank you so much for those definitions! Learnt so many new words. Also, hahahahahaha, falling dick first!
I’m dying over here about the inclusion of a glossary. Falling dick first—I like it.
Pretty grisly stuff here, Pal. Well writ!
Oh, wow, Paul, this was raw. Like continuation of your revelations in separating artists from from their works story. Riveting.
Wow, this is such a powerful piece, Paul. I did have to look up some things (before I knew that there was a note down at the bottom), but that also made it a learning experience for me and enriched the experience for me. I am amazed at the depth of this poem and how powerfully it struck me, especially given that it’s a villanelle, a form that I have found very difficult to work with. Excellent job.
Ohh man this is utterly classic. Excellent sork