The me I was always supposed to be

There was a hunger inside of me,

You think it was just for food,

But it was so much more.

This hunger was yearning to feel

Alive, important

Cared for

There was a disconnect inside of me,

From my sense of self,

My sense of safety

I didn’t know what it meant

to feel a safe connection

To feel that security within myself

I didn’t trust myself

My body or my mind

This felt like the only way out

I had powerful emotions,

And I was ashamed to have to feel them.

I began to learn that healing was an option

And that it consisted of key points

Time, awareness, and practice.

I began to broaden my world

And those I allowed a place within it.

There is a light burning through me

That is reclaiming parts of myself

That have felt hidden and rejected

There was a whole world kept from me,

A whole me kept from me

Sometimes I look in the mirror now

And I smile

I am becoming a friend to myself

And maybe, it’s not a new me-

Maybe it was the me I was always supposed to be.