She silently hides whenever she’s scared,
She quietly weeps whenever she’s sad,
She berates herself if she ever feels angry,
As she constantly hears that voice telling her she’s bad.
**
She’s only a little girl with little understanding,
How is it that’s she’s made so wrong?
She’s different to everyone else she knows,
Constantly told she doesn’t belong.
**
She cowers whenever she feels happy,
Knowing it’s so temporary that it can’t be right,
She learned early on that life is a war zone,
One in which she must constantly fight.
**
She cries herself to sleep after every bad day,
Understanding that she’s not perfect like she should be,
She’s come to expect the daily punishment,
Feeling lost if she has a day that sees her free.
**
As she grew older she knew she had to hide who she really was,
Or nobody would love her, she was unworthy,
She tried so hard to be little Miss Perfect,
But it was exhausting play acting and begged for mercy.
**
Age gave her wisdom but it took its time,
Over five decades to show her the score,
Until one day she woke to the understanding,
It was her self-love she needed more.
**
She struggled with this dilemma, fought screaming and kicking,
Knowing if she didn’t love herself, no one else could,
She’d never fully open her heart to another,
If she didn’t love herself as she should.
**
It’s a tough daily battle and she’s not sure she’ll ever win,
But it’s a fight she’s taking on with all her might,
She’s not all bad, there must be some blessing,
And she hopes that one day she can be her own shining knight.
Hannah Logan (Medium Writer) invited me to write a piece about ‘loving ourselves first before loving another.’ Thank you Hannah for the invite and I apologise for my tardiness in responding.
Please click the link below my name to read more of my work. I would also like to thank you for taking the time to read this today and for all your support.
If you enjoy this piece, you may enjoy this one too.
Please visit my website if you'd like more information on my newly published book, Battle Angel : The Ultimate She Warrior.
Originally published on Medium
About the Creator
Colleen Millsteed
My first love is poetry — it’s like a desperate need to write, to free up space in my mind, to escape the constant noise in my head. Most of the time the poems write themselves — I’m just the conduit holding the metaphorical pen.
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The Quiet Influence
The Quiet Influence An oracle on steadiness, softness, and returning to oneself Author’s Note This piece was written from a place of quiet integration rather than urgency—a moment when nothing needed to be solved, proven, or pushed through. I wrote it for those who are discovering that healing doesn’t always arrive as a breakthrough, but sometimes as a gentle settling into presence. If this feels anticlimactic, tender, or unexpectedly emotional, you’re not doing it wrong. You’re likely learning how to rest without disappearing—and how to let yourself be held without effort.
By Flower InBloom2 days ago in Poets
Comments (3)
Challenge marvelously & poignantly met.
So glad she realised the importance of self love and to give it a try no matter how hard it is. Beautiful poem!
Beautiful piece that, while sad, has a such wise and hopeful ending