Spiral

we’ll I’ve been getting older

But I ain’t been growing up

Lately my self evaluation

…isn’t measuring up

I’ve been putting paint chips on a wall I’m never going to paint

Raking leaves into a pile I’m never going to scoop

It’s been about a year since I turned 27 and I been thinking about Cobain

…

But 27 isn’t going to be another unfinished challenge

This ain’t like the paint

… but then again I started this in 2020 and it’s nearly ‘22

It’s 1:00am and I’m spiraling, cause sleeping is something I can’t seem to do

And god what is this

Loathsome chain of thoughts

I can’t finish even one thing anymore

I’m afraid I’ve already lost

The person I would have been,

should be,

might be?

The loves I’ve had and things I did have all forgotten me

It’s been too long since I did them right

Too long since I did them true

Too long since I did anything at all from beginning all the way through

And fuck, I gotta ask myself

‘hey me, who are you?’