Reconnection

I wish to see them again—

not just in dreams, not just in the hollow ache of memory.

The ones I lost when I was too young to understand

and the many I have lost since,

one by one, slipping through my fingers like sand,

while I stood helpless, grasping at nothing.

______

The world feels like a stranger’s house,

its walls pushing me out,

its air unfamiliar to my lungs.

____

The world feels hostile,

a place that spits me out

and pulls them away.

____

I am a foreigner here,

wandering streets that refuse to recognize me,

searching faces that will never look back.

_____

Where are they?

What lies on the other end?

I still don’t know.

But the thought no longer frightens me—

because anything must be better than here.

Anything that cradles those beautiful souls,

if they are still preserved somewhere,

if time hasn’t unraveled them into nothingness.

______

Surely, anything that holds them

must be breathtaking.

I hope it is vast and warm,

a place where the broken are mended,

where love burns eternal.

I hope it is better than all I’ve known.

I hope it is waiting for me,

a door left slightly ajar,

a place I can finally belong.

_____

I want to go there—

not just for peace,

but for them.

To see their faces again,

to feel their hands in mine,

to hear their voices call me by name.

______

Can we all go?

Can we gather where the stars bend low,

in a light that erases the cruel finality of goodbye?

Can we stand together in a world

where nothing is lost,

where nothing is left behind?

_____

I hope they still live.

Not just as whispers in my mind,

but somewhere real, somewhere eternal.

_____

I hope they wait for me,

as I am waiting for them here—

here, in a world that grows colder

with every soul it steals away.