Pawn to G-6

Poppin' pieces on the white, like a blizzard

When we play we do it right, go for the gizzard

Fianchetto with my bishop (with my bishop), glide to N-f-6

Now my pawn gonna slide right to g-6

Right on g-6, right on g-6

My pawn is ridin' the high, right on g-6

O-O, wanna castle? Q-d-2 for remix

Knight is ridin', slick move! N-c-6!

*****

Castling on queenside?

Then m-move to d-5 (five)

Queen don't like my style, get that pawn to e-5

G-G-Get that horsey movin', watch that b-x-c-6

Now you counter e-x-d-5? Well N-x-d-5!

Oh yeah! Yeah!

Sicilian dragon, dragon yeah!

White pieces all around me, stark on the checkerboard

Yeah you bet they wanna get me, is it dark on the wrecker – bored?

Your bishops wanna cuddle? My knights are ready with their swords!

*****

Never blinkin' at the board, like a lizard

Takin' pieces left and right, like a wizard

Fiancetto on the way, yeah? Well, B-c-6

Two can play that way, pawn's at g-6

Right on g-6, right on g-6

Duck and cover like a pro, pawn's on g-6

Right on g-6, right on g-6,

Movin' just a little slow, pawn's on g-6

*****

Bring it on, bring it on, whiz, I'll make your brain fizz

Gotta keep attacking, that's the game in this biz

This is what we do, hit the time clock

Put this battle right to bed, right now it's time to rock

Oh yeah! Yeah!

Pump it up, puh-pump it up

Got an army all around me, gotta keep on till we're done

Monochrome, a stark contrast, no time for weak grayscale,

Diagonal to get me past, a chance to win or fail

*****

Major players movin' round, like I figured

Grindin' our defense down, nothing filtered

White pawn to g-4? Easy fix

Match ya new play, pawn to h-6

Hold the line up, pawn on g-6

Got a buddy, kapow! Sat on h-6

Like a ton of bricks, bishop on e-6

Where's your chess god now? Pawn on c-6!

*****

Now the action's gettin' louder, louder, get your hands up

Back and forth across the border, are ya feelin' ganged up (you can't touch this!)

Can't recover, that's an order, your pieces gettin' jammed up

Should have watched your border, now your smack talkin' is clammed up (can't touch this!)

Oh yeah, your queen is runnin' for the side

Make you take my rook, now your defense is open wide (you can't touch this)

Oh yeah, your queen is runnin' back to base

Bishop takeout, that's the play, my queen runs like it's a race!

*****

Poppin' players off the board, pieces littered

These are moves you can't ignore, hopes have flickered

Check and mate and end game, there it sits

And I still have a pawn sat on h-6

You call it quits, I flipped the script

When you play, that's the way, then you take the hits

You want some tips? When the crown slips,

Dues you pay, hit replay, work on tactics.

*****

Based on the Sicilian Dragon game of Duda, Jan Krzysztof (2724) vs. Nakamura, Hikaru (2781) shown at https://www.chess.com/article/view/what-is-a-fianchetto-chess-terms#chess-openings

Original earworm from the late aughts by Far East Movement can be found here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GvgJEznqtms

Image credit is that I created it via Craiyon AI, but wow did it take waaay too long for the program to understand that a pawn is NOT a Queen!