Paul on Paul by Paul
Inspired in part by Sonia Heidi Unruh (to use the word, jiggery-pokery)
Your name is Paul Stewart, is that correct?
Yes, that is correct
(You should know)
You're 34 and have a BSc in English Literature, is that correct?
Yes, that is correct
(You should know)
Liar! You're 44 and do not have a degree in any subject
Why does it matter what I answer?
(Yeah, what does it matter?)
Integrity, honesty, playing by the rules. Why do you insist on involving yourself in jiggery-pokery flam-flam skulduggery?
(och, away yee go wae yer auld tak o' goodness)
(from the Scots joukery-pawkery)
There are Rules there are to be broken
You claim to love the language, though, while you rape and abuse it
(abuse? whit yee oan aboot...)
Then say you are a poet, but show only disrespect and disregard for traditions and forms
just stoking the irony or ire—ony (from a Scots word for any)
(How dare you, you cad)
(He's a poet cos he kens it)
The traditions and the forms, like the rules, are there to be skewered and flagrantly )ignored( and )avoided(
You can take your rules, traditions and forms and shove them.
Oh my, oh my, no need to get so aggressive
(you, started this)
Oh, I haven't even started
As I sit here reading your bureaucratic idiocy, I can't help but smile with bubbling, seething rage
The old masters were many things, many of them were even pretty good and deserve the accolades and respect awarded them.
Do you know, though, what else the old masters are?
Go on...
Not here.
(Mic drop drop mic moment)
So, wind your neck in and take a seat to witness greatness free of the trappings of the rules, traditions, form, rhymes and things like iambic pentameter
Poetry is beautiful, poetry is life
No. Poetry is ugly/beautiful, life/death
(Just like this)
Poetry is deep and impactful
Not always. Sometimes poetry is superficial and inconsequential fun
(Just like this)
ire—ony
*
Thanks for reading!
Author's Notes: I forget what comment thread it was on what piece, but I used the term "jiggery-pokery" while replying to Sonia, then it somehow turned into a self-imposed challenge for me to use it in a poem. So, ta-da. Please follow the link below and check out some of her stuff as she is a sublime poet who makes me look like some kind of rank beginner who was somehow allowed to pretend to be a poet.
If you like, here are other things:
About the Creator
Paul Stewart
Award-Winning Writer, Poet, Scottish-Italian, Subversive.
The Accidental Poet - Poetry Collection out now!
Streams and Scratches in My Mind coming soon!
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FPS: The Last Flame Challenge Winners
Welcome to our first Winners Announcement of the year and to the final challenge in the Fall Poetry Series. The Last Flame invited writers to sit with endings, using fire as a central image to consider what remains when something burns out: ash, warmth, memory, silence, or the faint promise of what comes next. The strongest pieces treated endings as gradual rather than sudden, allowing them to flicker, dim, and linger.
By Vocal Curation Team4 days ago in Resources
Comments (21)
You know Paul, you're just too bloody funny. Almost .... Almost distracts from how good you are lol
Congratulations on placing on this week's leaderboard for Most Discussed Story! Well done!
Just saw this on the leaderboard and the title still beings me joy!! 😁
Congratulations on your leaderboard placement I missed this the first time out You are quite the conversationalist
Jiggery pokery is a great word! Is this a peek inside your brain? Bonkers, innit!
From the title to the last line this was just great!! Kind of felt like a weird inquisition of sorts! And such a fun sprinkling of phrases throughout! Wonderful, Paul!
Yes, indeed this is Bloody brilliant. I really like the Scottish lines for when I read them, I think my little bit of Scottish blood came out for I was told of Scotch, Welsh and British blood I have.
Bloody brilliant! And definitely not inconsequential fun. Think it says a lot about the snobbery of the literacy world. But was is language if not to represent who we are - in whatever dialects and tongues we use? Meh feeling all philosophical this morning apparently 💜
Poetry is deep and impactful Not always. Sometimes poetry is superficial and inconsequential fun! These are so pure lines. Great work ✨
Never lose your sense of humour😂 'Then say you are a poet, but show only disrespect and disregard for traditions and forms' I loved that line because I hate having to follow styles or forms of poetry. Free style all the way🙌🏼 ALSO, do I have your permission to post a review thingo of your poetry book on Vocal soon?😊I've been meaning to write one for ages and I've finally started, just going through and choosing some of my favourites from it now.
It's a marvel how half of your poems deeply move me and the other half make me laugh out loud. You've got real skill when it comes to drawing emotions out in readers. It's always such a rollercoaster of emotions with your work and I love it always! Great piece!
"You can take your rules, traditions and forms and shove them." Hahahahahahahaha that was my favourite part! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Iambic pentameter does my head in! I felt a bit split personality myself whilst reading this! 😅 I I don’t like rules either. In anything! Haha. FREEDOM! Here here! 😁👍
Such a good and unique idea!! And great in execution too! Love the blend of humor and reality.
Rules only apply in English class....loved this!
I'm just glad you've not shared what situation you were in when you wrote this. ;)
I agree with Ray, Paul. You are an iconoclast! Wished I’d thought that before he did though. Laughed out loud multiple times reading this too!
Truly iconoclastic. Well done
Creativity is in the hands of the creator. Poetry is in the hands of the poet. Really love your poem. Such a great message to it. Lol really loved the “not here” line 😆😆😆
I love the descent into madness and fun from these lines , excellent work
Yes, Paul, it's fun and can be what you want it to be! Write on!