Painfully slow

dysphoria hits slow

time slows down

But it’s not up or down

You’re stuck with dusted distress,

Like a glass figurine on the shelf

Years of dust settling

Skin cells. Tumbling. Crumbling.

You are painting a picture whilst standing still.

A ballerina. A pas de deux without

Your partner.

You cannot hold back your life anymore,

You gotta move.

You can have everything but have it snatched away

By killer claws that will bruise you like

Their property

And hold you like a lover, but won’t actually kill you off

Just there to remind you—

Claws sharp, always in sight, behave

It’s alright.

You’re welcome to come in and see the mess I made for myself

I think you’ll see the house clean,

Organized,

But I’m here,

Don’t you hear me between my

Laughter, so loud,

So painfully slow I am, still,

Dropped off like a old box of second hand stiffness,

Ready for the picking,

Dysphoria hits painfully slow;

Time hits like a clock tower, church bells,

You counting out,

1, 2, 3,

“You get another for your screams,”

It can drown out the silence.