Ode to Healthy Love

never understood the power of love

until you crash-landed in the center of my galaxy

almost eight years ago. your mean mug and mystery

appeal to my love of the unfriendly type.

a simple crush turning into admiration

transforming into a fiery phoenix, falling off the edge

and soaring above the blue skies with complete trust

that you’ll meet me in the clouds.

all my pessimistic elders told me,

“enjoy your youth,”

“play the field,”

“don’t settle down too early,”

“don’t put your faith in one person,”

“they’ll eventually disappoint you,”

putting their two cents into a register

never opened for the spare change.

my mother always told me to find

someone unlike my father and

my father always told me to find

someone unlike my mother,

but i found a person who has all the qualities and attributes

i love in the two.

i see my father’s love for video games,

reminding me of the man that used to sit me in his lap to let me watch

him play World of Warcraft and teach me

how to use the spells, which gear

would be the best for my class type,

and the best places to grind at while my eyes are glued

to the vibrant blue, green, and purple swirls

of the portal to Orgrimmar.

i see my mother’s quiet, but honest love,

reminding me of the woman

that was willing to switch entire work schedules

to make concerts or moving up ceremonies that i’d mention

on a random Tuesday night over dinner.

appreciating the random kisses on my forehead

before heading out for work.

the delicious pumpkin soup cooked whenever i fall under the weather,

and the listening ear whenever i need a friend.

i see the best parts of my parents in you.

your calm, soothing spirit ground me

on this planet and makes me want to stay here

for the rest of my existence.

no longer do i feel afraid of judgment

as you take me as i am,

a trait i wish my parents’ relationship had.

since fourteen, i’ve had consistent peace with you,

never had to worry about you devaluing my worth

as you’ve helped me grow from that angry, insecure girl

you knew in our freshman year of high school

to the mature, focused woman that i’ve become with your positive influence.

you’re my oasis, the one place i don’t mind spending

four hours straight just looking at you,

tracing the beautiful imperfections that make you

who you are and the tattoos we share in common.

i want to start a family with you,

combine our families through our saying of “i do”

and bring new life into this world

let us be our kids’ love role models

show them what healthy love looks like.

at times, i feel unworthy of you,

my insecurities and anxiety hovering

over my brain like a nimbus cloud

but you are willing to sit beside me,

breathing in my shaky exhales until

the storm passes. i think i’m okay with falling.

only if it’s with you.