ode to blonde girls

My hair

Is cut

All different lengths

Because I am too poor

To not cut it myself

It’s the color of dirt

Not soft

Not smooth and straight

No mermaid waves

Or big bouncy curls

Is always up

Tangled

Revealing my

Huge ass forehead

My eyes are muddy

You can never tell

What color

they are

And you can barely

See

My lashes

My lips chapped

My skin yellow

Rashes

Cuts

Bruises

My nails are too short

Because I bite them

I always have an ingrown toe nail

Even when I put on

Makeup

I don’t look like them

I can’t seem to master

Whatever

Tik tok trend

Got them to look

So flawless

Skin so smooth

Not a blemish in sight

I can work out

Do whatever diet

I need to

Keep myself skinny

But no amount of

Sit ups

Can make me

Desirable

Not like her

Not like them.

They’re the kind of girl

Who never had to chase

Never got on Tinder

Never had to settle

Never had question

If they were loved

Because daddy

Did in fact

Tell them every day

They were never on their own

Because they married

Their high school sweetheart

Intelligent

Nurses

Teachers

World changers

Mothers

They weren’t called sluts

In the hallway

Didn’t have to

Hide

The slits underneath their sweatshirts

They were respected

Not assaulted

Never sat on a psychiatrist couch

Never had to take pills to function

Never thought about taking them all at once

Never decided to.

I wish I could be untouchably beautiful like that