Now It’s Gone

remember when it was hot outside and we would sit with our backs against the yellow siding and we would let the warmth touch our faces, the bare feet touching the hot concrete tiles and we would think “there’s no place better than this?”

Now it’s gone.

Remember when we had to sit on stools gathering and picking the black currents until our fingers were dyed in dark red. Then we would think “why do we need to do this?”

Now it’s gone.

Remember letting our bare feet touch the best grass right by the pond? And we would be dunking our feet in the cold pond. And we would think “how perfect is this?”

Remember how winter would come and we would create a whole snow family by rolling up balls of white? And we would think “winter is really not bad.”

Now it’s gone.

Remember how you sketched out the perfect garden that you promised you would take care of and you thought “finally a garden that’s mine!”

Now it’s gone.

Remember how we pretended to be dinosaurs roaring the garden making faces and making each other laugh. We would think “this is funny we should do it more often”.

Now it’s gone.

Remember how you set up a hammock in the garden by the May Day and wanted the listen to music and read a book with a pillow and you thought “this is exactly what I wanted”.

Now it’s gone.

Remember how we used to run through the sprinkler on the dried spikes of grass and it would always turn to a water fight. We would think “I’ll get you with the hose next time”.

Now it’s gone.

Remember when we got a tree for earth day from school and we watched dad dig a hole in the front lawn and planted it. We thought “that’s going to be here forever”.

Now it’s gone.

Remember when we sat at the front of dad’s Volvo and we prentending we were driving away to go on a race track. We’d think “I’m so fast no one can beat me”.

Now it’s gone.

Remember how we used to climb up the tree and watch people going by pretending we were spies. We’d think “they can’t see us”

Now it’s gone.

Remember when I would poke at ants and find new ways to tease them and get them swarming. I’d think “what else can do with them?”

Now it’s gone.

Remember when we bought a pool and it was too cold to swim in, so we carried hot kettles of water to and back just to realize it was still cold? We’d think “why is this taking so long?”

Now it’s gone.

Remember the hot summers when our dad would be grilling up a steak and we would all eat together. We’d think “what can get better than this?”

Now it’s gone.

Now when I drive down that road where the little yellow house stood it stands no more.

Now when I drive down that road where the four large trees stood they stand no more.

Now when I drive down that street all I see is black and white.

Tall unrecognizable houses. Barely a backyard for children to learn to ride their bikes or to build a snow man. My memories all erased as if we never lived there

Because we don’t. They took it away and built a boring black and white duplex. My memories wiped as if it never happened. As if my childhood was not real. I cannot show my children where I used to live because

Now it’s gone.