Not Your Sugarbaby.

I don’t know...

But I thought maybe he hadn’t heard it before. I thought, maybe he was just lonely. But I guess this is a lesson in you can lead a horse to water but you can’t make them drink.

I figured I’d let him annoy me until he started pressing for personal information then I’d call it quits. Some small part of me thought he’d stop and realize what he was doing. But no, just no. A friend told me it’s no use and to just stop responding. I guess I have no choice but to listen... I mean I do have a choice but she’s right, what’s the point?

I also switched my account private so as to at least limit this from happening again. But what if it wasn’t me, what if it was someone a little bit younger and a little bit less well-rounded. What if they went to meet him and didn’t come back? This is my worst fear for online generations (my own being partially included in that).

That’s just my afterthought, but here’s a poem I wrote to get some of my more “in the moment” thoughts out:

Titled: not your sugar baby

I don’t want to ignore the message

But does this guy really think I’m that regressive?

I legit just try to boost up my confidence and fit into my own skin only to get bit on the shin?

But an “Alpha Dog” like this

Is no leader of the pack...

He’s a lone wolf.

He says he wants honesty,

but he really wants a tame pet,

a puppet of society.

This man has no propriety or respect

he thinks I’m an object put on display,

probably thinking

“How much do I have to pay for it?”.

If this is a game

then I don’t want to play in anymore.

Somewhere along the line,

playing tag got lost in translation

with the game of telephone.

And the person at the end

instead said

“You’re not ready, I’m here, now run!”

Instead of

“Ready or not here I come!”

So don’t ask me why I’m already done

living this belittling disrespect

before I’ve even started dating.

Before my first kiss... first date... first anything I get “Do you want to be my sugar daddy?” the answer is no. No, I’m not a baby. I’m a grown a** woman and I guess it’s not obvious that I don’t need to be burped or changed so I’ll explain it to you.

End rant,

Christina.