Nearer, My God, to Thee

Fine china rimmed with gold

Clinking tableware

First class passengers

Dine with grace and flair.

Spiced beef and boiled rice

Hot cream of barley

Chocolate eclairs, and ice cream

Washed down with burgundy.

Cello, violin, and bass

Along with piano

Play ragtime tunes and waltzes,

A melodic ebb and flow.

Polite talk and chatter

Laughter through the night

Air that’s warm and lovely

Gentle glow of light.

Bellies are filled to the brim as

Drunken, happy friends

Applause for the orchestra,

The evening meets its end.

Instruments go back in cases,

A day of work is done

With plans to sleep the night away,

And wake up with the sun.

Returning to the cabins

Living second class

I settle down a moment,

Gazing out through glass.

Pitch black fills the sky and

Melds with the sea

On the ocean in a ship

Feeling trapped, yet free.

I change into my sleepwear

A white linen nightgown

But there is something left to do

Before I lay me down.

A small stack of papers

With notes drawn on each page,

A song composed for my girl

To whom I am engaged.

Music emerges from my heart,

Sweet, light, and kind

Paired with melancholic tones

The harmonies intertwine.

I think back on a winter dusk

Bone-chilling and wild,

But we’re inside, safe and warm

Us and our unborn child.

Four days away from them

Four days too many

I play to work to earn money

For we do not have any.

Sudden movement breaks my thoughts

Monstrous shudder and groan

It shakes me to my very core,

Sets fear within my bones.

I peer into the hallway

Others do the same

Confused, worried faces

Peeking through door frames.

Retreating back inside

My heart stutters, uneased

Something feels amiss

On these Atlantic seas.

Then there’s yelling in the hallway

Too many thoughts to think

The worst comes to fruition

The Titanic is going to sink!

I rush around the room

Putting clothes on in haste

I bring my violin, nothing else

There is no time to waste!

I find my other band mates,

And together we follow the crowd

Bumping, pushing, wails and screams

Terrifying and loud

Lifeboats begin filling up

Women and children first,

But will every passenger be saved

Before the ship is submersed?

There are far too many people,

And too few lifeboats

Many will be left aboard

When the ship ceases to float.

Bandmaster Hartley brings us aside,

His hand rests on my shoulder

“We will stay and play,” he says.

The words crush me like a boulder.

To play until we’re washed away?

To play until we die?

There’s no way I’ll do it, I think

But then I hear a cry.

I look to find the source

My eyes meet little ones;

A small girl with rosy cheeks,

Her hair done up in buns.

She grasps her mother’s hand

As they wait in line to flee

Seeing them reminds me of

My fiancée and our child to be.

If I manage to board a boat

Someone else will not

Do I have more of a right to live

Than anyone else in this lot?

The answer sits heavy on my chest

I take out my violin.

The band stands together,

And then the music begins.

For two short hours we play

Until every last boat is filled.

For two very short hours we play

Over cries that are sharp and shrill.

Soon I too am plunged into water

From ankles to waist then throat

I hold tight to my violin case,

And pray it will keep me afloat.

I need to hold on, I must hold on.

Hope inside me lingers,

Though my lungs fill with water

And I lose feeling in my fingers.

In my last moments of life

I think of my loved ones on land,

And pray they will forgive me

For playing in this band.

Titanic, the ship of dreams

That’s what she was supposed to be,

But instead of going to America

She brings us nearer, my God, to Thee.