my story

this poem is about being your own worst enemy, about realizing it too late that you've pushed away the ones you love and were there for you at your worst, and yet they tried to love you through it. it's about the emptiness in longing for your soulmate, being so close but still unable to connect, and the shame and guilt in knowing that you can only blame yourself.

---------------

my story

is all about

you,

about realizing

what a stupid

backwards

idiot

i've been

for blaming

you

for all my shit

and thinking that

you

were doing that to me...

but, things are far

worse than what

i feared.

you...

you-.

you

were not

the ghost in our bed.

it was me

haunting the sheets

and who i should have been

so careful of,

because i have been

hurt before,

and i was not

smart enough to know

better than

mistrusting

you.

because i'm stupid

and ignorant

of myself sometimes.

and i hate that

i have always

been an asshole

when i am

waking,

in transition

[and in general].

but i am awake now

and i love

you

and i am sorry.

it was all my fault,

after all.

i was the problem.

the whole of it.

well, mostly.

please come home

soon?