With a whoosh, a towel floats down.
Possessions are dropped, awaiting my return.
Feet pad across warm, silken sand.
Toes curl around golden grains.
Sun comforts with its soft morning glow.
A sip of morning, salty sea air.
That first icy kiss tingles.
Breath departs momentarily.
With each wade, body harmonises with the water.
Head tips back, and I float.
Eyes rest closed for a spell.
Mind wanders, lost in reverie;
what if I just went under and stayed under... forever?
Feet drift down to the seabed.
Legs traipse back through the ocean’s pulse.
Breeze lightly nips at wet skin.
Towel wraps around my damp curves.
Bag slung back over my shoulder,
my stride carries me to the car.
About the Creator
Sandy Gillman
I’m a mum to a toddler, just trying to get through the day. I like to write about the ups and downs of parenting. I’m not afraid to tell it like it is. I hope you’ll find something here to laugh, relate to, and maybe even learn from.
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Comments (13)
Hugs to you Sandy.
I found myself completely lost in this reverie, Sandy. Your use of Asyndeton let the sensory details just float by without any weight. But when you finally anchored the rhythm with 'Head tips back, and I float,' it catapulted me right back to the start. It gave my senses a sweet nativity before the jolt of that Anacoluthon. That line: 'What if I just went under and stayed under... Forever', is a cold, wide-eyed shock. The way the following lines relax back into a steady breath is truly unsettling. Best of luck in the challenge! 🤗🌼
Very Aussie 🤪😂😂. Is this for the unnecessary line contest? I felt like the “what if I just went under” line jumped out as stark and dark, in the best way.
The imagery in this so good, Sandy! Loved it!
man nice and peaceful-I want to go swimming now
This was peaceful to read, even the part about going under forever. My first obsession was mermaids and that's actually what that line made me think of. Beautiful work.
Oh how I love the idea of being able to relax like this. You really took me far away from the daily grind. Beautiful Sandy!
This was a really cozy poem :) It’s snowing again out here. I can’t wait for some beach time and a season change haha
Stunning writing Sandy! You made me want to go for a dip! lol
What a lovely poem, Sandy! I was transported there briefly, I could almost hear the sound of the waves in my head. :D Oh I missed that sound so much. "what if I just went under and stayed under... forever?" I think this is the most powerful line here.
Hahahahahaha I had the same thought as Cristal when I read that line! Loved your poem!
Morning mermaiding magic 🧜♀️ 🪄 I feel placed right there in the moment and feel the magic in contrast to the daily commuting and tasks. Great work!
Ahh, the imagery! I'd love to start my morning like this! ✨ But also, I was like 'No,no,no! Don't go under! Don't you remember what happened in 'Beach vibes' when you did that!?' 😅