I never thought I'd long for the sting
of stale cigarettes in my nostrils each night,
as I watch the shadows of trees haunt my bedroom walls.
Or the taste of old wine prickling my mouth and burning
my throat as if it knew I was too young to lie.
I never thought I'd revel to tread down creaky sunrise stairs,
awash with old anxieties and the idea that somewhere,
under mossy earth, you'd stir a final time. To that, I wouldn't be opposed.
I never thought my hands would remember what my mind could not,
the ridges of your identity, and eternity in your rings.
I never thought my heart would melt with glacial pace
instead of break all at once, though I would have preferred
the latter.
About the Creator
Kaitlin Oster
Professional writer.
MFA Screenwriting - David Lynch School of Cinematic Arts
Website: kaitlinoster.com
Writing collaboration or work, speaking engagements, interviews - [email protected]
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1:49am
4/16/25 1:49am I want to breathe death in my larynx and feel loose change in the torn and raggedy pockets of my mother’s cardigan. The water is next to the bed. It’s not cold and never will be. So I guess what’s left is us; we will walk with crooked feet on a path carved by ancient societies. You will borrow my shoes. I will taste vengeance in my tea and convince myself it’s good for my liver. Coffee is fine too. Yes, that’s all. I will think about how I want to kiss you and, the clouds, they will rise to space, and leaves, they will glue their limbs back together. The sun has been out for weeks. This screw isn’t any looser than when I bought it. But I will wake up and I will be in the ship that splits in two and slide my sullen palms across its tundric pillow. I never took swimming lessons so whatever happens is meant to be. I’m sorry if that upsets you. I’m sorry I said that. Anyway, I want to lie nude in wildflowers with ants who build colonies and worms who can’t see. You have a problem with textures. You can’t help it. I could try to tell you things, like how I want my children to understand how little everything is and to not be afraid of the giant fingers that grab at sewing needles in their dreams. I could say it always scared me. It’s just not right. But listen, back to it: I want to indulge in passion and binge affection. Is it a sin if it helps? I will endure the things I am given and inculcate everyone around me to do the same. Do five laps around the block before you respond, whatever helps. I will tell you I want harmony to be palpable and wheels of recognition to be locked in an imperishable gear. Refill the pot if it’s empty. What I want has nothing to do with me. Diagonal tile is cold, you know, and my hair gets crunchy after too long out there. I want this lesson to end.
By Olivia Dodge5 days ago in Poets
Comments (1)
Nice tho "eternity in your rings" left me questioning.