In To Me See

Relationships

Or "two ships

passing in the night"

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow wrote this right?

Sparks flew and that was the end.

I think not as we are looking for a happily ever after bend.

I never wanted to be a ship

Or simply a blip

on another's radar

And luckily that is not what has happened so far

My relationships have been about intimacy thankfully

And please do not think I'm just referring to sexual intimacy fortunately

there is emotional, physical, social, esthetic, recreational, and spiritual.

Finding the commonalities becomes a ritual

for me

It is ‘In to me see’

Allows you to see me and me to see you,

such a good way to be, when there is intimacy, with who?

What is most important for a relationship is that there be intimacy in seven categories, but at least more than two.

And the more the better for a marriage, I dare even say today.

I have been married a total of 40 years to this day.

And 8 years more to prepare for those three marriages, so 67 minus 48 is only 19 years without a husband.

It can bring me to tears

Thinking of all that time

And this rhyme.

Three times is the charm

And I'm with number three and he didn't twist my arm.

We worked at friendship first

It had nothing to do with our thirst

I allowed for him to see in to me

without sexual intimacy

as friends can do that right?

We have had some of the best intimacy at night.

So I will end this rhyme with this to get it off my chest

21 years with John has been the very best.

I recommend giving this a try with all relationships as you won't know how it works until you give it a try. Why wouldn't it work to have things in common in all of those seven areas? John and I have several with just our motorcycle riding. Just a very few examples. We ride in the great outdoors, recreational and esthetic. We attend meetings together and separate, spiritual and social. We love family time, which is emotional and physical. And of course we experience sexual intimacy as a old married couple.

Friendships are special to me also and I know that I spend time with friends canoeing, in the boundary waters canoe area (BWCA) and have for many years, that intimacy is recreational and esthetic. We spend time together in person, on the phone, through zoom and texting and keep caught up on Facebook and email as well. That intimacy is emotional, physical, spiritual and social.

Every year I attempt to bring those that are interested from my friends group on Facebook to writing poetry and minimally rhyming. A Poem A Day In February is a healing way to benefit from writing all month. It helps to have a daily practice for some of us of writing and healing. I offer contests for the participants to win prizes. I love this one month out of the year that allows me to give to others in ways that I would have never imagined.

Then, my fundraising. It used to be the first Saturday in May, and due to the pandemic it is different. I participate in the Powwow For Hope fundraiser each year that raises money for The American Indian Cancer Foundation. Last year my Team Carrie raised $1,200. The fundraiser is usually for an afternoon. The amount we bring in is usually $600-700 dollars. I will continue the support of this fundraiser in memory of my sister, who died from Leukemia in September of 2010. Each year I have something I have written to sell. Others contribute items they have made to sell. I also contribute and bid on items from the silent auction.

Because of being a woman in long term recovery, I give back by speaking in treatment programs when I can, by sponsoring other women and sharing information that is both positive and uplifting on Facebook and other social media. I teach a class and encourage students to learn about prejudice, racism, white privilege, trauma, and other important things to know, not to stay there and blame, rather to learn from and be a change agent in their world to make a better future. In other words trying my best to move in the direction of the message of Martin Luther King, Jr.