If Not Now...

Tomorrow I'll be good enough.

Today I'm not quite there.

Tonight I'll find some brand new words

To send the sky the same old prayer.

When I wake I'll know the way again

To the spark that lives inside.

Somehow, right now, I know it's there,

Yet it's found some secret place to hide.

Could I not know all the places, spaces

In my heart where one might slip away?

I find the younger me is wiser here,

My knowing less and less at each done day.

My bones, they shudder with frustration.

My soul, it begs for me to peek within.

My song, it haunts me in my dreams.

In waking life I'm deafened by the din.

Yet here I am, again and yet again.

I look – it's gone, as if it's never been.

Or rather

My eyes don't see what my ears hear.

My chest feels what my brain can't spin.

Where do I begin?

How do I come in?

I've been here all along

But I feel stranger than a friend.

Tomorrow when I wake up

I'll be fluent yet again.

My native tongue, I'll know it when

My heart embarks upon my pen.