I'm Hoping They Don't Notice

I put my hair up

Haphazardly because

I’m hoping they don’t notice

How greasy my hair is

I put on ruby earrings

They sparkle in the light so

I’m hoping they don’t notice

That no foundation, contour, highlight

Is shining there as well

I put a flowing skirt on

With the waistband nipped in high

Cos I’m hoping they don’t notice

That my belly bulges out past a place it shouldn’t

That I hide a fat thigh

But who are “they” that matter?

My lover, family or friends

They won’t notice any of that

Or my efforts to conceal

They’ll notice if my eyes are red

From crying

They’ll notice if the lids now droop

with fatigue and world-worn weariness

They’ll notice if I’m eating much more or less

Not because it matters

or because perfection is the key

But because the only thing worth noticing

Is if I’m still being me

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