Hobbies

You once told me, my hobby was you,

my independence washed away,

within the words of your truth,

I couldn't see it for the longest time,

how my happiness,

would flip on the cost of your dime,

My twenty-two-year-old self,

Just wanted to be loved,

Just wanted to fix it or help,

I would have thrown myself away,

At the end of the day,

To make sure you were okay,

Youth,

Undeniable, illogical love,

Painted on a canvas of our self-proclaimed truth,

Five years later, I can honestly say,

You were right,

In the best of the ways,

I stand here now,

A whole person, I couldn't be with you,

I am allowed,

I am brand new,

I no longer seek to fix the damage that was lost within you,

Or anyone else,

I understand my feelings that are encouraged to be felt,

I have real hobbies that make me feel whole,

Connections with others that,

I wouldn't have otherwise known,

So, though your words stuck to me like gum on my shoe,

I am thankful for the process,

to find someone I never knew,

Full of things that I love,

Hobbies that I get to do,

Instead of settling on what life would have been with you.