i swallow so many pills
that most would think that i am terminally ill
my state of mind is not great when i am sober
i go searching for an explanation to gain some closure
driving myself crazy looking for an answer
overthinking really is my cancer
why was i not good enough for him to stick around?
i have lost my old self. she is nowhere to be found
why does heartbreak have to hurt this much?
i try to seek a cure but there is no such
digging myself a deeper hole
lost all of my self control
to confront my problems is tough
i really thought i was strong enough
given up with boys. i could write endless novels
given up with girls. now i kiss bottles
and honestly, a feeling i cannot take
a hangover hurts a loss less than a heartbreak
About the Creator
Kiesha’s Diary
𝚠𝚎𝚕𝚌𝚘𝚖𝚎 𝚝𝚘 𝚖𝚢 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚕𝚍. 𝚠𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝚠𝚎 𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚌𝚑𝚒𝚕𝚍𝚛𝚎𝚗 𝚘𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚞𝚗𝚒𝚟𝚎𝚛𝚜𝚎. 𝚗𝚘 𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚝𝚛𝚎𝚎𝚜 𝚘𝚛 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚛𝚜. 𝚠𝚎 𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚎 𝚊 𝚛𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝 𝚝𝚘 𝚋𝚎 𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚎 ❀
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Day 4 of Quitting
If this is how sobriety feels, maybe it’s better to go through life a little buzzed… this, along with other hits like, I want to kill myself, I wish I was dead, and I’m going to throw myself off a bridge have been the only thoughts on rotation these past few days. I promise myself that if, in a month, I still feel like this (‘this’ meaning despondent, full of rage, and simultaneously numb) I can go back to smoking. Until mid-February though? Nicotine is off the table.
By sleepy drafts6 days ago in Longevity
Comments (3)
Overthinking is my cancer too. This was such an extremely relatable poem!
Fantastic!!!
Super!!! Excellent