"Good morning. Did you sleep well?"

"Good morning. Did you sleep well?"

Kind of, I actually -

"Don't forget to eat some protein this morning!"

Of course, just got to wait for this nausea -

"Did you take your medications?"

Not yet, I try to take them at the same time each day, but I'm only human so sometimes I forget -

"Why don't you set an alarm?"

Because I end up just ignoring them if I'm doing something else. They aren't reliable for me. Can we slow the ques -

"Oh shoot, you got to message back your doctor ASAP! Don't want you to get low on those prescriptions."

Yes, I've been meaning to do that. Just keep getting distracted -

"Hey! Made any progress on the novel lately?"

Some? Did more world building, and I added a few pages some weeks back. I wish I could write every day. Do you think - ?

"Do you think you can help me today? I'm so tired and I got so much on my plate!"

Uh, sure, I suppose so. I don't know if I'd be able to write today anyways -

"Don't forget to clean the cat box at some point!"

Why would I forget that? Can you -

"Have you published any new pieces on Vocal recently?"

Um, no. It feels like I got a lot on my plate but I want -

"Yo! You gonna get back on the server and work on that build we were talking about?"

Yes! I would love to! I just been feeling overwhelmed, and honestly I need to focus on things that -

"You need to think about the future. How are you going to afford a house? A car? You won't be able to retire if you don't have money put away."

Yes, I know. But I want to try and make this work first. I just need time -

"Did you remember to message your boyfriend today?"

I was going to then forgot. I'm going to see him this weekend so -

"Are you going to make it to game night this week?"

I don't know, I really want to but I'm so tired. Will you be mad if -?

"Your parents have more procedures coming up next week. Will you be able to drive them to the hospital?"

Of course I can, they're my parents. It's no prob -

"Your eating too much again. Why not try this medicine to lose some weight?"

Is that important right now? There's other things I should focus on -

"Your losing sleep again, and your anxiety is high. Did you forget your meds?"

No, this is just how I woke up -

"Can you -"

ENOUGH!

Gun shots rattle out of my lungs like rusted tin cans, exploding into the late night like cannon fire. My thoughts are a swirling storm, a hurricane of drifting notes, dates, and tasks that must be met lest I drown in the torrent.

I turn in my bed, my stomach instantly turning sour, and my head pounds as I squint at the clock on my phone.

3:23 am

This is the third time I've woken up tonight. It seems like I won't be getting any quality rest like this.

I sit up and breathe in, achingly aware of my racing heart practicing tap dance routines in my ribs. Even as I go through the techniques taught to me to calm my mind and body: stretches, deep breathes, positive thinking; it takes over an hour before I can rest my head back on the pillow, the engine in my chest mercifully quiet once more.

"Good morning. Did you sleep well?"