Good Enough

"Your colour's gone

Just like when every winter comes

I miss the way I used to love you"

-Blue October "The Way I Used to Love You"

It’s that slow growing ache stalking me

Creeping in the night hiding away

More than a thief casing his prey

My nightly companion that blurry wall in the sky

It’s that wall, more like a net, catching all my frustrations and sorrows

The creaking, more like a cackling, taunting me

Whispering, screaming, reminding me

The worst is yet to come

The opening of a barred door, bringing more than company

Shaking hands, the chills down my spine, the whispers of the night

Cold breath against my ear the companion to icy arms hugging me in place

“If only you were good enough.”

As Their fingers slip between mine

Reminding me of all the ways

I used to love you.

Or rather,

Reminding me of all the ways

I still hate me.

Wasted times pass by like a flip book

Over and over again

Punishing me

Reminding me

I’m just love stupid

Glutton for punishment I watch these pages turn

The "has" beens

And the "could’ve" beens

The "should’ve" beens

And the "never gonna" beens

That once flying feeling now a falling

Are you okay?

Am I okay?