Garden Of God

A Catholic

a Christian

and an Omnist

walk into a garden

The Christian says

to the Omnist

"I went to church yesterday."

"I feel so good."

"The preacher said,

'If you eat only bread you will always be hungry,

but if you eat the bread of god you will never go hungry'..."

The Omnist said with a smirk,

"Where do I get me one of them god loafs?"

The Catholic laughed

because he knew it was a joke

The Christian got defensive

and said the Omnist didn't understand the story

The Omnist smiled,

"Relax. I understood every word. I just like to laugh. That's a beautiful story. Thanks for sharing."

The Christian asked aggressively,

"You're not even Christian, how can you understand!?"

The Omnist replied,

"I was once upon a time. I've read the Bible front to back. It's got a lot of really great allegorical stories, but some people take the book too seriously."

The Christian demanded,

"If you know the Bible so well, tell me a story."

The Omnist smiled,

"Okay. I'll tell you a story about faith."

"This is a famous one. Even those who don't read know it, but I'll explain in my own way."

"The homie Noah got a message from god saying that a great flood was coming, and to prepare for the flood by building an Ark."

"God said to gather his family and the animals of the Earth, and prepare for storms like he's never seen before."

"So Noah followed his faith, followed his intuition, and did what god had intended for him."

"People mocked him, called him crazy, but that didn't shake his faith in his mission."

"When the storms came he was prepared to set sail on a quest that was divinely orchestrated."

"Those who laughed at him were now put in their place, but that's not the point of this story. The point is Noah was saved through his faith."

The Christian's jaw dropped,

"Wow. I've never heard it explained that way."

"I owe you lunch or something."

The Omnist asked,

"For what?"

The Christian said,

"For putting me in my place when I had my doubts about you and your faith."

"Tell me, if you don't believe in Christianity, what do you believe?"

The Omnist smiled again,

"I believe you can find truth in everything."

"Underlying their apparent differences all religions are the same."

"Faith, love, and kindness."

"Those are the fundamentals of spirituality, and the basis of any religion."

"Religions are just cultural expressions of what is one in the end."

The Catholic interjected,

"What do you believe about death?"

The Omnist smiled,

"I believe in energy. I believe what lives in a physical body is eternal, and death is only a transfer of energy."

The Catholic asked,

"So do you think you'll go to heaven?"

The Omnist replied,

"I considered myself Buddhist early on in life, and that's the religion in which my beliefs on the afterlife are most aligned."

"I believe in karma. I believe in reincarnation."

"I believe how you live your life determines where and how the energy of your soul is transferred."

"I believe I can make it to heaven again. I've lived my life right. But I'm more interested in reaching nirvana, so I can end the cycle of learning through strife."

The Catholic said,

"That's not how I understand heaven."

The Omnist smiled,

"Well we have different beliefs, and that's okay."

"From my studies in Buddhism everything is part of the cycle of reincarnation. Angels must descend from heaven, demons must ascend from hell, all within time. Nothing is permanent. The only thing that liberates a soul from the cycle is enlightenment."

The Catholic looked curiously at the Omnist and said,

"I try to talk to my family about reincarnation. They are strictly Catholic, so they think I'm crazy."

The Omnist replied,

"My family is Catholic. They think I'm crazy, but that's a relief considering their dogmatism. Besides, Tupac taught me 'Only God Can Judge Me'..."

The Catholic asked,

"Why aren't you Catholic?"

The Omnist said,

"Catholicism has been a questionable route for me since I was young. It's hard for me to follow a religion that not long ago taught that you can pay your way to heaven through indulgences."

The Christian said,

"Hey, I forgot about that."

"I think I'll make it to heaven. I believe in god."

The Omnist said,

"From the Buddhist perspective, that's not how it works. To make it to a higher realm, we have to walk the right path of that vibration. I've spoken with a Buddhist monk over the years, who said, 'By the way humans live our lives these days 90% of us are going to hell'..."

The Catholic hung his head and said,

"That gives me hope."

"I might as well just do all the bad things I ever wanted and forget the whole religion thing."

The Omnist smiled at the Catholic,

"Have a little faith. I said that is the percentage as of now, but things can change."

"Think about Buddha himself."

"A rich, spoiled, and entitled prince."

"And we know what money can do to someone's morals and good will."

"It was after he left the kingdom, and became a vagrant that he experienced hardships, starvation, and through the struggle he reached enlightenment."

The Catholic smirked and his eyes lit up,

"You're right. Thank you for that."

The Christian said to the Omnist,

"You know, I like talking to you. Sometimes it takes me a while to figure out what you mean when you speak, but I always learn something."

The Omnist laughed,

"You remind me of my Critical Thinking in Literature professor, 'God, stop raising your hand! Everytime you speak it raises 20 questions'...."

The Catholic

the Christian

and the Omnist

walked out of the garden

as they laughed