Fearful

The bad memories come flooding back without warning

I feel the unwelcoming familiar touch of a hand on my upper thigh

The hot foul breath against my neck

I am frozen with fear

As minutes turned to hours

I slowly realize I am spiraling down a deep dark part of my mind

I try to climb out,

but all the hands that have ever hurt me are grabbing aggressively at me

Not letting me go

I try to kick and fight excessively

Nothing seems to work

I open my mouth as to let out the loudest scream I can

In that moment I wake with a flood of salty tears burning my eyes

My heart is POUNDING

I am awake

I am alive

But I live in constant fear