fanning flames until everything is on fire

Oxygen is the fundamental reason fire exists.

Fuel is another fundamental reason for fire.

My fire needs passion

My head is down and bends against the wind

Until I've caught enough and spit sparks and fireworks

A signal to the world that I'm not done.

But fire is fundamentally bad.

Sure, it strips the ground to make it the dark glass of secret-holding cars

And smashing through the crust comes more green than ever before.

The records bow their heads against the wind, beside me.

But..

It still fundamentally requires fuel.

And look.

The trees are brimming with deep, delicious energy.

Easily consumed and burned until even their wisdom is a memory left to join the ground.

And turning to the skies are the doves whose throats cannot take the smoke.

But what else are they but carriers of all the world's purity?

The masks still hoard it like rich women with their heels.

But all that's left is for the two-leggeds to run for the hills

That we see are burning upwards because fire loves climbing to reach even the farthest doorway into hope and hell.

Reduced to skeletons and scars are what they are all destined to be.

The thickest-skinned don't care since their serene deserts of pain and experience outnumber the dreams caught and carried by me.

But the feathers falling while the doves are left to choke,

And the determined, stained-glass stories written in butterflies' wings;

They're hurting.

But in my mind,

My bags and bags of wind,

Justify everything I've done.

Is it worth it?

And then I've tripped on a thick-skinned friend

Whose warnings I wish I could avoid,

Says the cost of spitting great loud fireworks

Is enough for me to want to stop.

Unsatisfyingly I must reign in the fire

Let the doves finally breathe

Allow the clouds to clear and the bear to emerge

Where we'll all kneel and beg to be free.

This fire must be tamed,

I need to "control myself"

But then who decides what's wrong or right,

When the world is stuck-up inside itself?

And the tiptoeing to win the race

Without causing the bear to awaken,

Is not a world I thought this'd be,

And is not my fire's fault.

How is everything I've thought and felt,

Worse than our isolation from fun?

And the caving of my joints

Because the wind got too strong

Shouldn't be a reason

For me to not reach the mouth.

My difference has sent us backwards

But I still want to not be done...

For fucks sake

Why is this so hard to make sense of?!

~