Existence

Her existence is a constant nagging in my head

It says you should have stayed.

It says, he has found someone new, yet again.

It says, you will never be his one.

It says, you are destined to suffer as he loves another

But his existence is the life that keeps me going.

The nightlight that keeps the monsters at bay.

His existence is the calm after the storm.

His existence is the color in my life.

The creative spark I once lost.

His existence is what I live for.

And Father I know, you'll tell me he's not good enough.

You'll tell me I should move on

That noone is worth this pain.

And Father I tell you, I know what I should do.

But what I should do and what I want to do are two different things.

And Monther I know, you'll ask me why I'm still nice to her

You'll ask for name and information I dont know

And mother I know would do this because she is hurting your little girl.

But Father, Mother, I Love him, more than you'll ever know.

And while her existence causes me pain,

Her existence brings him joy.

It brings him a little bit of hope in this dark world.

She is falling for him more every day.

And my heart breaks a little more every day

Because I think he is falling for her more every day.

And while I sit and write this

I wonder, if I was ever good enough for him to begin with.