Exhaustion

I can hear them giggling. But my body will not move.

I can hear they are hungry. But my body will not move.

The baby is hungry. But my body will not move.

The dishes need done. But my body will not move.

It is not that it can't move, its that it won't.

I want to get up and be the best mom I can be.

But my body will not move.

I beg my brain to fix itself. I will myself to get out of bed before noon.

But my body will not move.

The baby is up for the day, so I use all my energy to slide out of bed.

But my body hurts. My legs feel like led. My head feels like I drank all night, even though I am sober. My eyes are burning as if someone blew black bonfire smoke in them the night before. My brain is foggy, and my heart is already racing, and I just got out of bed.

My anxiety is already holding on tight. My heart is racing as I make my body move.

It's time to survive time. But I wish I could live, but instead I just survive.