This is a public service announcement to all those who think A Christmas Story is a good Christmas movie. News flash: it is NOT. I will be explaining the reasons with an elegy. So sit back, relax and enjoy my invention. And if you're already rolling your eyes, this is for you.
O fragile relic of the past that will not die
You flicker back each December
Unbidden
A ghost rerun
Preaching a Christmas spirit you never had
Unchallenged, unchecked,
Wrapped tightly in nostalgia's gaze
That survives on memory alone
And nothing else
At your center stands a boy
Defined by greed
Never satisfied
Endlessly indulged
Rewarded for insistence
As though desire were a need and not a want
And greed were not a sin
There is no friendship here
Only triple dares that are cruel
A tongue stuck to a flagpole abandoned
Boys turning on each other
Passing blames for words said by parents
O childhood movie of the past
Your jokes are dim
Your famous lamp dimmer still
Your plot scattered
Like cockroaches mistaking light for warmth
Your power is fading
Enduring only in a select few
Families
Mistaking repetition for tradition
I hope this elegy makes you at least think twice before recommending it - whether it's a good movie or if it's just for nostalgia’s sake. And if you need more points, I did not even mention the blatant disregard for his wife's feelings about the lamp and his affection for it. Ralphie even mentions that the gun was his best gift ever, so does that mean every other gift since then does not compare? (Kind of selfish…) The neighbor’s dogs ruin Christmas dinner forcing them to go to a chinese restaurant with a neon “Bowling” sign. Is it a Bowling alley or restaurant or both? Who knows…
I understand it's a comedy but if you are going to label it a Christmas movie, at least let it have a good message with some character growth, and not Ralphie getting the BB gun just out of desire, but rather because he earned it. The daydreaming fantasies take us out of the story and the half bitten apple on the teacher’s desk is just rude and cruel. Think twice before handing down this message to others.
Actions do have consequences and we need to be grateful for what we have.
About the Creator
Emma Mark
Home for the thoughts I’m too afraid to voice out loud. Maybe someday I won’t be…
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Comments (1)
I completely agree!