ChrysaLIE

I am you & you are me.

We are one, can’t you see?

I did not always live like this

I too was lost in the abyss

But then the time was here and now

The instinct, the call, the sacred vow

I felt it deep, so deep inside

The feeling could not be denied

I followed it in every breeze

And heard it call me through the trees

I found a spot, the perfect one

A form of armor was what I’d spun

Safe inside my chrysalis

Twas there I thought I’d find my bliss

Bound so tight & wove so strong

I stayed inside, for oh so long

I couldn't see, I couldn't hear

It was so very dark in there

Had I made a grave mistake

My head, my heart, began to ache

I heard the call and so I went

How long I’d waited for this event

It felt so right, it felt so blessed

And I in no place to contest

Divine direction I did crave

I would ride to shore upon that wave

But there I sat, afraid again

I prayed aloud before amen

Is this the plan you have for me?

I asked the sky, my deity

Waves of fear, tides of pain

Is this where I’m to remain?

Then one day, I don’t know which

I felt a tingle, a phantom itch

A ray of light had broken through

Someone to save me, this I knew

I waited there, so still & calm

For her to take me in her palm

To hold me, making all things right

Why won't it stop? This endless night?

The ray of light, my only hope

It was no more, I tried to cope.

My insides turned, I writhed in pain

I cried, I screamed, but all in vain

The sadness that had dwelt inside

Had forced my soul, my self to hide

The glimmer of hope had sparked something

My soul, my self began to cling

She felt the warmth, the sun, the source

She felt within the spiritual force

The dark was cold, my tears were hot

Letting go of all I’d thought

It hurt to push, it hurt to pull

But push I did, with force so full

This self made cage was holding me

Keeping us from being free

I pushed again, I scratched, I clawed

Out of breath, so weak, so flawed

That part of me, the invalid

The one who always ran & hid

Blocking what I should receive

Making it hard to believe

The anger boiled, bubbling hot

All of this, it was her fault

I am the light, I know the way

I will not stay here in decay

The anger steamed, erupting out

I found my voice, and lost my doubt

I kicked, I punched, I tore the fray

The strings that tied me down each day

And there I stood, no longer tethered

I saw sadness, so gray & weathered

She looked so frightened, so small, so weak

I inched toward her to finally speak

Why have you kept me in this place?

No sun, no light upon my face

Pale & shaking, she shook her head

You let yourself be so misled

I was not the prison guard

Look at me, I’m just as marred

And as she spoke, so soft & meek

My entire body began to leak

The tears they came, from every part

From mind, from throat and then from heart

And there upon this great release

A wave of calm, a sense of peace

I looked at her, she looked at me

All along I was the key

I had been the one untrue

I had split myself in two

Blaming everything on her

And never looking for the cure

The darkness was a hiding place

There I did not see my face

Over my eyes I pulled the hood

Went on pretending because I could

Denial is a tricky thing

To our own lies, we do so cling

Instead of seeing things as they are

We drift & drift, so very far

And when we choose to just ignore

Those things that haunt us at our core

The things about our shadow self

We place awareness on a shelf

Without the dark, there is no light

The battling forces are our plight

As Abel was to his twin brother

You cannot have one without the other

There is no joy, without some pain

Without crazy, what is sane?

And as these thoughts, swirled round my mind

I began to see, no longer blind

I felt it coursing through my blood

The light, the truth, began to flood

My blurry sight, becoming clearer

All that is good was coming nearer

Overcome, I knelt in prayer

My broken pieces, I would repair

While realizing I did not need

To understand it to proceed

Black & white, then something more

Amazing colors the light had bore

Parched & gasping, I drank them in

My wings, my faith, I went within

I left it all, the thoughts, the fear

My soul began to reappear

I felt the joy wash over me

I was the fish, it was the sea

I stretched my wings, I tried them out

No sense of worry, no dreadful doubt

The threads that held me in that dark

They fell away, without a mark

And there I rose, above it all

Without worry that I’d fall

This is my time, it is so clear

I am ready, I claim this year.