Check the pockets

I don’t think that i’d have done it,

Not made this oversight.

I probably would have caught it,

If I hadn’t drank last night.

My head indeed was fuzzy,

My judgement less that right;

My jeans they needed washing,

That’s how my money met its plight.

You always check the pockets!

My mother said to me.

If I had heeded her advice,

Then I would surely see.

A five, a ten, two twenties,

Were nestled nice and tight,

Right there where I had left them,

That rather drunken night.

The water did its damage,

The soap did dirty work,

They tore apart my treasure,

My dollars had been murk’d.

No bank would dare accept them,

No merchant trade their wares,

No way I can contest it,

This confetti won’t pay fares.

This loss will now require,

A bit of overtime.

My balance sheets been foiled,

I could have bought more wine.

So here’s to moderation,

That now has been imposed.

This ain’t the path I’d taken,

I’ve added to my woes.

Next time i’ll be more careful,

I reassure myself.

A lesson has been learned here,

All it cost me was some wealth.

So listen to me brothers,

And all my sisters too,

I tell you now my story,

And you know this wisdom true.

Next time you’re feeling tipsy,

And that laundry day is due;

Be sure to check the pockets,

Or you’ll be feeling blue.