Broken Balance

Free to choose or maintain control,

Chase a dream or checkmark each goal.

Accept mistakes or hide regret,

Remember - forget.

Everything at once, or nothing at all,

Rabbit racing to the finish or joining the tortoise crawl.

Powerful and productive, tasks complete,

Sluggish and sulking, energy deplete.

Crying, hurting, and begging for aid,

Empowered, confidant - no help needed, self-made!

I know who I am and what I want,

Then, self-doubt, insecurity, and self-destructive taunt.

Clarity, focus, and on the way,

Confused, clouded, and not enough pay.

Sobriety, strength, and progressive pride,

Reckless, will I relapse to respond I tried?

Favoring illusion, chasing a fantasy,

Jaded by life's cruelty, paralyzed by reality.

Been on my knees, now in the clouds,

Lonely in solace but suffocated in crowds.

Balance broken - internal compass cracked,

Is success still possible, blocked by bricks that I stacked?

"To light a candle is to cast a shadow…"

― Ursula K. Le Guin, A Wizard of Earthsea