After The Abyss

When I get a glimpse of who I was before everything burs together.

I paint these parts of myself with nostalgia.

The rain is less inconvenient.

The darkness is spiked with light.

I mourn the memories, the shadow— the dream.

Briefly forgetting that the moment is now.

Now fragments of the whole reinvent themselves in every direction.

New notions fill my mind.

There is a new method of forward motion— that I can not seem to find.

I need to acquaint myself with my new gravity.

Now is the perfect time.

A few steps in, something shifts.

I’m standing on shaky ground.

The earth cracks open like an empty shell.

I am falling now.

My spirit accelerates.

My mind shifts into a lower gear.

My world slips into two dimensions.

I let go of my compass and my maps.

Up or down is all that matters now.

Now I hold my heart to my knees and tuck in my head.

My eyes clench shut.

I measure the time in exhalations and notice the spaces in between.

I take stock of all that I am and make a discovery.

Sensation returns in a peculiar order as I uncurl myself and open my eyes.

Now I hover over a hole too deep to be defined.

Pins and needles fill my outstretched wings.

I do not ask if I deserve to fly.

I just flap my wings and rise.