Acknowledging the Universe

I am

I wonder how I’m going to deal

I hear the third space

I see the confetti in the air

I want to believe in a capital S-something

I pretend to be unaffected by loss

I feel the tenth level of pain

I touch the place where he is broken

I worry I will harm the universe

I cry for fear of drowning in the rolling tides

I am

I understand that the universe needs to be noticed

I say that it was worth it

I dream of a capital S-somewhere

I try to believe there is more than oblivion

I hope he knew

I am