a date

I have a date with today’s date

everythin’ goes so smoothly

as if it were

first love

freshly spreadin’ its wings wide

or the first poem, even if it is

my tenth today

and I was writin’ them

for more than ten years

in two languages;

is it somethin’ with the digits?

I used to believe in their magic

I can’t stop this train

it accelerates quickly

like a suitcase on wheels

and I can still

carry on

after more than twenty-four hours of bein’ awake

it’s like a disease

insomnia? schizophrenia? bipolar?

I have all of them

I haven’t slept

of my own free will

for the last twenty years

pill pills pills

I swallowed loads of them

but the best part is that

not everyone can live like this

life inside

usually at its best, just sometimes

a crack in my fragile sky

reminds me of it

this is all I have

when I go out into the world

it’s usually with a poem

rhymin’ words or not

then a long descent

down the line

until connections work

in my favour again

fillin’ the white pages

with words worth weavin'

written down and received

by the outer world;

say you’re there, if you want

I confess my vices and virtues

so you can too

continue this conversation

in any viable volume

***

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