Gary, IN USA

I live in the shitty part of Chicagoland - where regular people lock their car doors when they drive through. You know the places - where people of color live on streets named after Ceasar Chavez or Martin Luther King. We don't even have those roads here but people still get scared. I'm not saying that racism doesn't exist here because we're all the same - it sure as fuck does - but here, in Gary, IN, USA, it's like Detroit. You don't want to be here if you got a choice.

You'd be the racist if you'd think I'd show you shitty slums and our crappy downtown area, busted-up buildings, and crap no-name people, all looking for handouts or hustling drugs. We got those, sure - but what's the point is showing you stuff you already know or think you know? I want you to get to know the real place. Like the Chinese bridge down at the lagoon by the lake. You get the odd addict OD'ing here but it's a pretty place to be. One where you can listen to nature maybe while thinking about what to do next. There are lots of parked empty cars nearby too that you can rip off when the owners are at the beach. I'd get high here, grooving on the birds and stuff - maybe walking over the bridge counting the wallets left behind so they don't get lost or stolen 0n the beach. I'd bust in their cars and then hang out here.

We used to play a lot of b-ball out here too, but the games moved inside now. Nobody on the courts 'cause of COVID and the cold weather and shit. We had a lot of hassles too at the community center so that was a no-go after my pal T-2 got iced (so called because we had a T-1, but he gone), the local cops told us we couldn't even play there no more 'cause of trouble, so we had to stick to at-home nets even if they were all busted up and shit. I was never any good 'cause I'm too short anyway. B-ball's a tall playa's game.

We had a circus come by last Summer though. Real weird with all these dark Italian guys and gals pretending to be American. They did some spooky ass thing and it wasn't even Halloween but I snuck in when no one was looking. It was easy what with folks checking out the pretty gals and weirdos out front of the tent pretending to be vampires and zombies and shit. I seen enough real dead people anyway so I went inside and watched them do their scary stuff. They didn't have any animals 'cause that's cruel - but they were pretty funny but I didn't get scared once.

This is what I see outside my place from my basement bedroom window. It looks like the sea to me. I ain't never seen the real sea. I seen the lake a lot and they got real waves and shit - but this is like what I imagine the 'Lantic or 'Cfic would look like. But in color. In my dreams, I'm in LA or Florida or some place, and the water be just rolling in and I'm drinking a big fruity drink and I'm feeling real fine. This place out here has kept me sane when shit's going down on the street but it's probably a shitty photo to you - but it's my happy go-to place.

I took this, my phone's sort of fucked, but I can't remember if it was the bottom of a statue I saw once or some rubber mask that was out front of a local store. Every picture I take here in Gary IN ends up looking scary or weird or spooky but I'm not doing anything. I'm just living here, you know. Every shot reminds me that I'll be dead soon.